


What could Have been.

by ApaolalLV



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Angst, F/M, Fix-It, Fluff, Multiverse, Oliver Queen Loves Laurel Lance, Rewrite, Romance, Second Chance, lauriver - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:33:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28074759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ApaolalLV/pseuds/ApaolalLV
Summary: Trying to stop the Anti-monitor, the whole team travels to an alternate universe in which Oliver Queen gets to see what could have been. And when the time comes, he makes some decisions based on what he learned. Will he try to make it a reality? Or just leave it at what could have been?LAURIVER all the way! A fix it and rewrite for the couple since they never gave us the deserved closure.
Relationships: Barry Allen & Oliver Queen, Laurel Lance & Cisco Ramon, Laurel Lance & Oliver Queen, Laurel Lance & Sara Lance, Laurel Lance/Oliver Queen
Comments: 13
Kudos: 15





	1. Alternate reality

**Author's Note:**

> I will make it clear that I did enjoy the way Arrow ended. And I will also admit to have nothing against Olicity (at the couple final seasons), but, I just love Lauriver and would have loved to see them together again, so here’s my trying to fix them and giving them a second chance because why the hell not? Hope you enjoy! Please feel free to leave a review or comment!

Oliver stepped into the portal first. His jaw clenched as he observed the brand new earth they were on. He turned to look back at the others. 

Sara was looking around with her arms crossed. Barry also observed their surroundings while Ray and John just stood mesmerized. Dinah and Rene had also joined them. Both eager to see a new earth. 

Star City, 2020, Earth 5. 

"The fact that this is another earth doesn't change the fact that what you will find here will be a little too close to home. So we need to stay focused, don't let personal issues get the best of us" Oliver spoke first standing firmly at the center of the group. 

"Kara, you said there were people here who could help us?" Oliver asked turning to look at her. 

"Yes, a group of heroes that have faced the anti monitor before. But he wasn't that big a threat back then. I'm afraid he's grown stronger over the years, and the threat he poses now"

"Is very serious" Oliver completed her sentence. He placed his hands behind his back feeling uneasy, nobody knew what would happen, they were dealing with creatures and forces probably nobody understood. He knew his death would be coming soon, it was the deal. To die so others can live. 

Yet that wasn't such a comfort, what would happen if he indeed die, yet didn't save the universe, no one would live. He shook off the feeling and focused on the task at hand. 

They had made the decision to seek for help before the whole crisis even started, Barry knew the exact day it would happen, so he contacted Kara. She appeared telling them she heard about a group of heroes on Earth 5. They knew a little about the anti monitor, and maybe that would be useful. 

"So how are supposed to find them?" Dinah asked stepping to the front. Rene always stood close to her, she is the only one he felt comfortable with. All the others except for Oliver were almost like strangers. 

"We've got to find a way to lure them out of their hiding" Kara responded. Barry looked down in thought, his hands on his hips. 

"These heroes have some of the best technology, they have cameras in almost every part of the city. The are also very picky about who gets to enter their Earth or not, which means they probably have seen the portal already and are on their way" Kara explained.

"You seem to know a lot about this group of heroes" John pointed out. "Do you know who they are?"

Kara swallowed hard while lowering her head. "I" she looked at Oliver and Sara who were standing next to each other. "I do" she admitted sounding scared. 

"They only gather in big situations, kind of like us" she turned to Barry. "But apart from that each hero is in charge of their own city."

Oliver seemed to understand. "So, given the fact that we're in Star City, we can expect a visit from..."

"The Green Arrow" Kara nodded. 

"What about Black Canary and Wild Dog?" Rene asked smiling. 

Kara sighed at Rene's question. Oliver frowned. 

"Listen, this Earth, is very similar to yours, you'd all be amazed at how similar, but there are also very different things, that, like Oliver said, may hit too close to home. Because you could look at those differences as something that could have been, for you, for your own life. What would have happened if you had done things differently"

Oliver took a deep breath. He eyed Sara who had a preoccupied look on her face. 

Just as Oliver turned around from the group to walk forwards he heard a very similar sound. Of a bowstring. 

He bit his lip and raised his arms. 

"Who the hell are you and what are you doing on my Earth?!" A deep modified voice asked from the shadows. Sounding very mad.

"We come in peace! We just want to have a talk!" Barry responded. 

"I'm smarter than that" the voice responded and everyone turned to look at the arrow that landed in the middle. Oliver stared at the arrow, so much like his, yet also much more technological. 

He had no idea what that arrow was for. Until he began feeling dizzy and realized there was smoke coming out of it. Kara frowned noticing how everyone looked like they were about to pass out, yet she herself not feeling anything. 

"Sorry, you'll have to try something harder on me!" She screamed at the shadows. 

Oliver saw how his teammates began falling unconscious. He fell to his knees just in time to catch a sight of the hooded figure before him. He had stepped out of the shadows. 

Oliver stared at the Green Arrow, his suit was different, his pants were a dark green leather, and then a lighter green boots that reached his knees and matched the top of his suit. It had short sleeves and then gloves that reached his elbow and protected his forearms. He had a hood as well, his mask was very similar to Oliver's. But what shook him the most, was the goatee. 

He fell to the ground still staring at his counterpart. Slowly he began closing his eyes, and then darkness took over. 

The Green Arrow looked up at Kara after observing Oliver for a while. "You're us from another earth?" He asked her and she nodded. 

"Well I knew this day would come" he reached to his forearm where he kept his darts and shot one to Kara. Bright green. 

"Kryptonite" Kara exclaimed before collapsing to the ground. 

"It's just a small dose I promise" she heard him say before passing out completely. 

"But I have more where that came from" he added. 

...

Oliver slowly opened his eyes, the light above him making him regret ever opening them. He squinted adjusting to the light and took in his surroundings. 

He could make out figured before him, Dinah, Rene, Sara, Barry, all of them in a little cell. Meta dampeners in every corner. He saw Kara's shackles and frowned at them, bright green. 

"You have trust issues in every Earth you know that right?" Kara asked him when she saw him beating awake. Oliver blinked and sat down. 

"Where are we?" He asked looking around. 

"I believe this is a much badass and more upgraded version of the bunker" Rene replied. "Seriously hoss we never thought of renovating it" 

Oliver rolled his eyes and stared at what was outside the cell. It really looked much more advanced. 

"This Green Arrow has some serious tech" Sara commented. 

The elevator doors opened and it revealed the same figure they had seen before. Yet without the hood and mask. 

"I know you aren't here to attack, you're the counterpart of us, our doppelgängers, you're also here seeking for help because you're going against the anti monitor" Oliver frowned at how much this version of him knew. 

"How'd you know?" Sara asked him. E5 Oliver smiled at Sara. "I know all about the anti monitor posing a threat to the universe, Bruce told me month ago" 

"Bruce?"

"Wayne. Batman. You know, angry bat that punches around" E5 Oliver smirked. 

"I also know you aren't villains because no villain would be stupid enough to hop on a portal in the middle of the city, in a large group, and stand around looking lost" he added. 

"And given the fact you have very similar suits to ours I figured you were here on a mission, to seek for help" 

Everyone nodded. "So will you, help us?" Barry questioned.

"Depends on what you ask of me. I'm getting my life on check and I'd hate for anybody to mess that up" he looked at Oliver. 

"You lot smell like trouble" he added and smiled again. Oliver frowned at how fresh this man looked, he could tell he was damaged in a way, yet he was also happy. Teasing around and sharing information like it was nothing. 

"We're only here to talk. So we would really appreciate if you'd let us out of our imprisonment" Sara spoke looking at the shackles on her hands.

"Again, I'm smarter than that. Funny how people think of me as gullible, I might have been at some point but not anymore. I do know your intentions but I don't know your methods. Which is why I can't trust you" E5 Oliver took a step towards them. 

"So we'll talk here. And I would very much appreciate if you could hurry this up, I've got a date, a pretty important one" he smiled.

"Well, as you said the anti monitor has posed a threat" Kara began explaining but was cut off by alarms blaring. The whole room was lighted by a red alarm. 

E5 Oliver turned around frowning. "What's happening?" He asked.

"It appears we are being attacked Mr. Queen" a robotic voice replied which confused everyone. 

"By who?" 

"I'm afraid I don't know, they're odd creatures" the robot replied and projected a screen.

The Earth 1 heroes recognized them very well. 

E5 Oliver turned to them. "You recognize these creatures that look like those Harry Potter things?" He pointed at the flying shadows on the sky. 

"Yes. They usually come accompanied by the end of the earth" Oliver replied. E5 Oliver raised his eyebrows. 

"Not if I stop them" He said and began walking towards the elevator. 

"Umm no offense, but you're not going to be able to defeat them on your own. They come in bunches" Barry told him. 

"Let us help you!" Oliver spoke loudly. 

"You'll need help, it's impossible to defeat them alone" Kara added. 

E5 Oliver turned back to them. "Who said I was alone?" He asked smiling and winked at them. 

On his way out he took his phone and brought it to his ear. 

"Hi" he spoke so cheerfully and so sweetly. "Listen I know we've got a date soon but I could use your help on something" 

Oliver frowned. Who could he possibly be calling? 

"You think that's Felicity?" Dinah asked him, he heard his counterpart laugh. 

"I know, I'd probably be dead without you" E5 Oliver admitted so openly through the phone. 

Oliver shook his head. "Maybe, but I, I don't think so" he replied as he observed the other man walking away, looking so happy, he was under attack, yet he seemed to be so chill. What was that? And why did he envy him so much?

They sat in silence for a while. Maybe 30 minutes. Knowing The Green Arrow wouldn't be able to survive on his own. Yet they couldn't do anything. 

Everyone turned around when they heard and saw a blue light expand into a circle. Cisco and Caitlin walked through it. 

"Oooh I knew it! Caitlin you owe me a 20" Cisco laughed. 

"We had a feeling you'd get into trouble, we've been tracing you all this time. You can thank us later" Caitlin explained while she walked towards the cell and got them out. 

Everyone thanked them while Oliver walked towards the monitors. "I've got a location on him and the creatures, let's go!" He ordered. 

"He doesn't waste a second does he?" Caitlin asked laughing. Dinah shook her head.

"We're gonna need to stay sharp and work together. We need each other to defeat those creatures, I am willing to accept that, unlike my fellow counterpart who has such a big ego he believes he can take them all down on his own" 

"He said he wasn't alone" Sara shrugged. "And called someone" 

"Sara he called his girlfriend" Oliver protested. 

"Maybe she will help him" she responded and Oliver sighed. 

"It doesn't matter what she will do, he won't survive, we need to get there and get there now!" Oliver seemed to be more angry than usual which confused Sara. 

"Fine" she walked towards the exit. Everyone else followed.

"I for one wouldn't be surprised if he was dead already, he's been out there for like 30 minutes" Kara commented joining Oliver and Sara. 

...

"I thought you said this was the location?" Barry asked looking around. Oliver had a frown on his face. He was also turning and turning looking for anything. 

"It was" he replied firmly. 

"So why isn't there anything here?" Sara questioned. 

"Well there clearly WAS a struggle" Oliver said pointing at the shattered things around them. They were standing on top of a building, one of the highest in Star City, there were shattered windows around them and on the buildings near that one. But it was all quiet now. 

They all tensed when they heard footsteps. And voices. 

"Are they all gone?" Oliver heard his own voice. He turned and indeed saw himself. Hooded and masked. 

"Yep" now a woman's voice. Everyone slowly turned to see the figures standing in the same rooftop yet at a higher level. Which means they could see the two but the two couldn't see them. 

The woman wasn't visibly clear yet. But there was something about her voice that made Oliver and Sara feel uneasy. 

She stepped into light, she had a mask and a wig probably. No woman was that blonde. Black leather suit. 

Sara's heart skipped a beat. Although she couldn't see her face. She had a good idea of who that could be. 

Given the fact both figures were standing against the light, it was hard to focus on the details. 

E5 Oliver stared at the city beneath them. 

"We're probably late for our date already" she told him walking closer to him.

"It's fine" E5 Oliver reassured her. 

"No Ollie, you said this was a very important date. I'm sorry it went wrong" E5 Oliver turned towards her shaking his head. 

"I'm with you. And that's all that matters" he wrapped his arms around her while she placed her head on his shoulder. 

Sara and Oliver turned to look at each other. Everyone was looking rather uncomfortable. Watching two people in love having a moment. 

"How beautiful is this city?" E5 Oliver asked. "Now that's it's safe you mean?" His girlfriend replied. 

E5 Oliver nodded. "There's something about looking at it not being destroyed that makes it feel like home" She added and he laughed. 

He turned around to look at her. "Or maybe that's just because you're here" he added and took her hand. 

She chuckled. 

"I'm serious. When I first came back from that island, I wanted nothing more than to kill those who were harming the city. Alone. Yet when you joined me, it wasn't about avenging, it was about saving. Making it better. And now look at it, the city is at its absolute best. It is the safest it has been in decades! I mean I'm getting bored because I go out like once a week to save it" he laughed holding her hand. 

"We both had something to do with that" 

"I know. But I couldn't have done it without you. And I want to assure that stay that way forever" he let go of her hand and turned to completely face her. 

"I think we should go and let them have their moment" Barry whispered into Oliver's ear. He just observed and shook his head. 

Sara was observing them the same way. 

"Ollie? What are you trying to say?" They heard the woman ask. 

"Dinah. Laurel. Lance" E5 Oliver spoke. 

A simple name. A name made Oliver's heart sink. Sara felt tears filling her eyes while everyone else stared surprised. 

E5 Oliver got down to one knee. E5 Laurel frowned at him. 

"I have a question for you" he smiled greatly once she brought her hands to her mouth, there was so much love on his voice as he held a box on his hands. He opened the little box to reveal a beautiful diamond ring. 

"Will you marry me?" 

Oliver couldn't help but smile at Laurel's reaction. She was crying yet smiling. 

"Oh Ollie" she kneeled down with him. 

"I love you so much" she told him cupping his cheeks. 

"Is that a yes?" He asked sounding hopeful. E5 Laurel shook her head and everyone watching felt their heart skip a beat, was she going to reject him?

E5 Laurel lowered his hood and removed his mask. His eyes showed so much hope and fear at the same time.

"No." 

She looked down at the ring and took it. She then placed it on her finger and smiled at Oliver. 

"This is" she added smiling and pulled him close for a deep beautiful kiss.

E5 Oliver returned it. Giving in to her. It was impossible to resist her. He let go of the box and took her on his arms, her hand with the ring stroke his cheek, while his hands rested on the back of her head. 

He had to stop kissing to just smile. He couldn't contain the joy. He had to show it. She laughed with him, both tearing up. E5 Oliver removed her wig and mask. 

Oliver felt like this was a kick in the gut. Not only was she alive on this earth, but she was also smiling. Non stop. In seconds he had seen her smile more than what she smiled the last talks she had with him. And as a cherry on top, she somehow smiled and was with him, which meant she was happy with him. Oliver would have deemed that impossible. He always knew she couldn't be happy with him. Well at least he supposed. He never truly gave it a shot.

The two held each other close, so close. His hands on her face as they kissed again. 

Oliver could almost feel it himself. The softness of her lips on his. The overwhelming joy that rose on his chest every time. Looking at her green eyes which showed how much she loved him. 

Oliver tightened his fists. He knew what this feeling was. He hated this feeling. It was jealousy at its finest. 

Sara wiped away her tear as it rolled down her cheek. She looked at Oliver who had such a pained expression. Kara was right, there would be things here that would hit too close to home.  
Except this didn't just hit close to home, this hurt, for it was what could have been. If Oliver hadn't been so afraid. 

Oliver's attention switched as he saw another flying shadow heading towards E5 Oliver and Laurel. 

He was quick to fire an arrow and take it down. E5 Oliver and Laurel pulled away and spotted him. She frowned. 

"Oh right. My doppelgänger's here" E5 Oliver said. He turned to look at his now fiancée who was now looking very confused. 

"I'll explain later, but right now it seems as if we have a new army of Harry Potter creatures heading towards us" he pointed behind her, she turned to look and rolled her eyes. 

Everyone got on a fighting stance. Barry was already running towards them taking down as many as he could. The whole team gathered on a circle waiting for the creatures to get to them.

"Who are all these people?" E5 Laurel asked looking at them. 

"It appears our counterparts of another earth have created a league of their own" E5 Oliver explained and she nodded. 

"Don't kill them. Just let them come to us" she instructed them. 

"What?" Sara was the first to ask, only then did E5 Laurel notice it was her sister, she smiled at her. She walked towards them all. "Just trust me okay?" 

Sara fought the urge to hug her. How she missed her damn sweet smile that always comforted her. Black Siren hadn't shown such a smile during her whole time on Earth 1.

"Alright everyone! Recommendation! Cup your hands like this, and put them on your ears! Press them tightly against your head! Make sure no noise enters!" E5 Oliver shouted while the creatures got closer. 

Everyone looked confused. 

E5 Laurel walked in front of them. 

"Do it now!" E5 Oliver instructed doing so himself and crouching down. 

E5 Laurel got on a stance and took in a breath of air. Next thing they knew a loud scream came out of her mouth. 

But it was louder than they had ever heard. Waves came out of her mouth. 

Almost everyone collapsed to the ground except E5 Oliver who just stared in awe. He was smiling widely at how the creatures disappeared to the wind with the scream. One by one they vanished. Until there were none. 

E5 Laurel stopped screaming and gasped for air. E5 Oliver was next to her immediately offering her his hand, which she took as she breathed in exhaustion. He smiled at her.

"You did good pretty bird" he assured her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She smiled at him and let him hold her. Screaming was pretty exhausting. Yet he was always there to hold her and keep her up.

Oliver winced standing back up. His hands still on his ears. 

"I had never heard such a scream" he commented. E5 Laurel gritted her teeth and stepped away from her fiancé, she walked towards Oliver. 

Oliver took in a sharp breath as he finally stared into her eyes. For so long, he had stared at this eyes, yet they had been different, they were infected by pain and evil, Black Siren never managed to fully look like her, no matter how much she redeemed herself, her eyes would always betray her, yet this Laurel, she looked so much like E1 Laurel, like his Laurel. And that gave him comfort. 

"I apologize for that. My scream was altered to be stronger and more powerful, because of this device Bruce gave me. It strengthens my powers. But I'm afraid I'm very dangerous because of that, and I don't want to kill anybody, so I try to keep it down a bit, only this time I wasn't using it against humans, so I could use it at my full potential, but I am sorry if I hurt you" she apologized gracefully, a subtle smile never leaving her lips. 

Oliver smiled. "You're fine. I forgive you" he assured her and received a nod in return. He wanted to hold her close and kiss her. Just like he did.

E5 Laurel tightened her lips as she looked around and noticed Sara's expression. She looked beyond broken. Staring in awe at her.

"Are you okay?" Sara swallowed down her tears, she sounded exactly like her. 

Sara shook her head slightly and smiled sadly at her. "You, you're dead on my earth" 

Those words stung everyone. Oliver looked down while E5 Laurel and E5 Oliver looked at each other. 

Sara wiped her tear away while E5 Laurel approached her. She placed her hands on Sara's shoulder. "Is there anything I can do for you?" 

Sara looked at her sister's counterpart's eyes. She hesitated for a second. 

"Can I give you a hug?" Sara asked with a broken and shaky voice. E5 Laurel smiled widely. 

"Of course" she replied and she herself pulled the younger woman into her arms. Oliver had to look away to not show his tears. Sara gave in to the woman's warmth, she knew this wasn't Laurel, but she allowed herself to believe, just for a second, that this was her sister holding her, just like all those times before, ever since they were kids, she was always protected by her sister's arms. 

Sara felt her head being stroked and she smiled. Pulling her sister's doppelgänger closer. After a long deep breath, Sara allowed herself to smile. 

"I might take you with me back to my earth just so you can hug me" Sara commented and E5 Laurel laughed. 

Sara closed her eyes and suddenly felt better, felt happier. All she had ever wanted since Laurel's death was to hug her, and with all sincerity tell her one thing. 

"Thank you" Sara whispered. E5 Laurel knew she wasn't exactly talking to her. Yet she just smiled and stroke Sara's hair again. 

They broke apart after a few more seconds and Sara could tell Oliver wanted to do the same. To hug her. Yet she also knew in his head he was already convincing himself, she wasn't her.

...

Everyone from the team sat in the Earth 5 bunker. Barry stood speechless staring at Oliver and Sara. Sara was already talking with this Laurel as if they were friends. Diggle had his hand on Oliver's shoulder while Oliver looked down, sadness written all over his face. Kara sat next to Barry not knowing what to say either. She tightened her lips uncomfortably. 

"Is this what she was like?" Dinah turned to question Caitlin and Cisco. 

Cisco shrugged. "I haven't seen enough of this one, but I can definitely tell you, she is way closer to the original than Black Siren, there's just this warm feeling about her that I had only felt with our Laurel. Not only that but she's good, she's kind, funny, and she's just beautiful" 

"Cisco had a crush on her" Caitlin revealed which earned her a look from Cisco and laughs from the other two. 

"It's just that, Oliver always talked about E1 Laurel as if she was perfect, and I always thought I could never compete. And seeing her, it's true, I mean look at her, she makes you feel good just with one smile! And she never stops smiling!" 

"Well, that, I'm afraid, is something the old Laurel didn't have, of course she did smile, but she wasn't really happy. It took her a while to feel content, and when she finally started to be, she died. I met her when she was going through her sister's loss so I never truly saw her like this, but, legend has it, before everything, this is who she was" 

Cisco lifted his eyes to look at her again. Laughing with Sara and E5 Oliver. His arm around her protectively while they just smiled. 

"And that's what's killing Oliver" a voice behind them interrupted. It was Diggle. 

"He's looking at who Laurel used to be, this Laurel, is the exact Laurel that Oliver fell in love with, she was all smiley and kind, and then he took away her smile. Oliver blames himself for changing Laurel. Thats why he was never with her again" 

"But if he knows how happy he makes her, why not just give it another shot? Well when he had the chance?" Rene asked. 

Diggle sighed. "Because fear won that battle, he much preferred to push her away, than to risk hurting her again. Nobody knows what could have been, or at least nobody knew, but now, seeing this, I think we've got a pretty good idea" 

Oliver who was on the other end of the room couldn't stop staring at them. E5 Oliver and E5 Laurel loving each other like he once did. She was with him despite his flaws, and he dared to be with her despite his mistakes. 

He saw how his counterpart began walking towards him, leaving Sara talking with E5 Laurel. 

"You okay there?" E5 Oliver asked taking a seat besides him. Oliver sighed and shook his head slightly. 

"Look I just wanted to offer you my condolences, when I heard your Laurel was dead, my heart ached for you, I couldn't even imagine what would I be like if I lost my Laurel, my home" 

Oliver smiled sadly swallowing down his tears.  
"Thanks" he whispered. 

"Were you together before?" E5 Oliver questioned. Oliver shook his head slightly again. 

"No I get it, too much history, you wouldn't believe this, I cheated on Laurel and went on a boat with her sister, we both drowned, I literally killed her sister" E5 Oliver explained and that earned him a glance from his counterpart. 

Oliver looked at him shocked. He had done the same thing. "And she forgave you?" 

"Yeah, it took her a while. But she did" Oliver looked down again at his response. 

"I always found it amusing how the woman I've hurt the most, is the woman I love the most" E5 Oliver admitted. 

"I have done, awful things to her." Oliver nodded. "So have I, so did I, and for that reason, I could have never been with her" 

E5 Oliver frowned. "What does that mean?" 

"It means that, you don't hurt those you love! You don't cheat on those you love! And I cheated on her! I hurt her!" 

"Now that's just bullshit. The whole you don't cheat on those you love might be true, but what I think happened, in my case anyways, was that Laurel gave me SO much love, for SO many years, that I took it for granted, and despite how awful this sounds, I knew she would forgive me one day, because she loved me so much. And I'm glad that I cheated on her. Not because I liked hurting her, but because I lost that love. God you should have seen how much she hated me!" E5 Oliver laughed. 

"And when I lost that love, I felt... dead. When she looked at me with hatred on her eyes, I felt lost. It took me loosing that love for me to realize, she was my home." 

Oliver wiped away another tear. "But she didn't deserve me, I had to move on! I had to let her move on!" He protested looking at E5 Oliver.

"That's what you told yourself. Isn't it? You justified pushing her away by telling yourself she doesn't deserve you" 

"Well am I wrong?" Oliver asked. 

E5 Oliver nodded. "Like I said before, I'm glad that I cheated on her, because being so lost, it made me hit rock bottom. I did just what you did, I pushed her away, I gave up on her. And then, Damian Darhk almost took her from me" 

Oliver felt like that had been a kick on the gut. He lowered his head and placed his hands on his eyes. 

"When she almost died, she revealed to me. That she loved me. And at first I thought the woman was crazy, who would love a monster? A mad man? A murderer? Who would dare to love ME?" E5 Oliver took a deep breath and looked at his fiancée. 

"Laurel always saw the best in me. And that's when I realized, throughout my worst, she always saw my best. And that man that she saw in me, he DID deserve her. So I promised her, right there and then in that hospital room, I said: Laurel, give me a little time, let me become the man you love, and I promise, the man you love will give that love back to you. Just let me become someone who deserves you" 

Oliver cried and smiled. 

"And she did, she waited for me. I worked my ass off, to become that man. And when I finally felt like I was him. I walked into that apartment, not caring about anything, and I scooped her up. The Notebook style, and I allowed myself to love her. To love me" E5 Oliver had tears on his eyes. 

"That day is marked as the best day of my life in my calendar, for I didn't just find true love, I found... myself, and at last...I was home" 

Oliver smiled widely. That's when he realized. That's why this Oliver wasn't like him at all, that's why this Oliver wasn't in pain all the time. He was home. And for him, that meant, he lived as a man who had accepted his flaws and worked on them, a man who accepted his past and rose above it, a man who worked on himself and allowed himself to love who he was. Despite everything. To him, home meant acceptance. 

Oliver had never accepted who he was. He always thought he was too damaged for that. But perhaps he wasn't. Oh... only if he could do it all again. Rewrite history in a way. Change destiny. Change reality. But he couldn’t. 

Could he?


	2. It begins

"In this file, lies everything we know about the anti-monitor" E5 Oliver gave a file to Barry. Barry nodded in appreciation. 

"I don't know how useful it'll be though. I'm about %100 sure he has grown stronger. And what's his threat anyways?" The arched crossed his arms over his chest. 

"He is threatening to vanish the whole universe, the whole multiverse. Taking down Earth by Earth" Cisco explained. 

E5 Oliver's eyes widened. "It sounds pretty big a threat, you'll perhaps want our help?" He asked taking E5 Laurel's hand. 

Barry opened his mouth and didn't know what to say. "We.. we couldn't ask something that big of you. Your lives would be at risk" 

"That's not new" E5 Laurel shrugged. 

"Ollie has almost died like one thousand times, and I, well I have almost died just once" she added and smiled. 

"The worst day of my life" E5 Oliver kissed her forehead. "No worries though, Damian Darhk ended up regretting ever hurting you" he laughed. 

Sara raised her eyebrows. "You were almost killed by Damian Darhk?" She asked growing. 

E5 Laurel nodded. "I caught the wrong end of an arrow, that Ollie fired, but, I made it" 

Sara shook her head. "My Laurel died the same way, she developed an embolism after surgery" 

E5 Oliver and Laurel looked at each other. "She... she did too, but the doctors managed to bring her back" 

Sara couldn't help but feel angry at that. "I guess you have better doctors at Earth 5" she said looking down. 

"Perhaps, although, I like to think Oliver saved me" E5 Laurel responded. She looked at him smiling. 

"Just before the embolism, he... he gave me a reason to live" E5 Oliver grinned in a cute way. 

"And what was that reason?" Cisco questioned. Laurel shrugged. 

"The idea of someday, Getting to know the best version of him. Him becoming the man I've always loved, and I have to say, he did not disappoint" she stopped looking at her Oliver and looked at Sara. 

"But, I'm pretty sure it was because of the doctors, we have VERY good doctors here" she nodded. "I'm sure your Laurel had plenty of reasons to live. You being her sister for one" 

Sara smiled sadly. 

Oliver looked down. He wasn't so sure about that. If only he had told her something different before she died. Would she have fought harder? Not that Laurel was weak. But she knew death implicated peace, it implicated Tommy, love, happiness, while life, her life implicated pain, struggle, hardships. Maybe she had just had enough. 

"Seems like we got derailed of the conversation, what we were trying to say is, we're not new to our lives being at risk, and from what we hear, they're at risk anyways. We want to help" E5 Oliver said firmly. 

Barry looked at Kara. "Okay then, I guess you can help us" Kara said smiling slightly. 

E5 Oliver smiled. "So when can we expect a visit from this son of a bitch?" He asked. 

"Soon" Barry replied. 

"I guess we should get ready then" E5 Oliver turned to his fiancée. 

"Okay, I'll call Adrian and tell him to step as DA while I'm gone" E5 Laurel took her phone. 

"Adrian Chase?" Oliver asked. The two from Earth 5 nodded. 

"Isn't he.. isn't he a villain?" Oliver questioned.

"He was, but because he worked with Laurel, she somehow figured out there was something fishy about him. We confronted him and stopped him before he could do anything, sent him to a mental illness institute, they treated him, turned him around, he just came back looking way better, we offered him his job back. And he seems to be doing great. Of course we're keeping a close eye. But I think he really did change" E5 Oliver explained. 

Oliver nodded. E5 Laurel started walking away. 

"Ooh Laurel! Can you please tell Tommy to cancel tonight's party?" E5 Oliver exclaimed. 

Oliver once again, felt his heart drop. Why was this world so perfect?

"We had a party tonight?" E5 Laurel questioned. "For our engagement." E5 Oliver replied smiling.

"Were you that sure I was going to say yes?" She asked laughing. 

"Of course." He smiled widely as she walked away chuckling. He turned around to the group before him. 

"T-Tommy's alive?" Oliver asked. 

"Oh yeah. I know what you're talking about, that night on the undertaking. He arrived to save Laurel and... was impaled by an iron stick. But then I took him to the hospital almost dead, he was in a comma for a good while. Laurel lost herself to drugs and pills not being able to give up on hope yet not being able to HAVE hope either. But he woke up eventually. And he's back to being himself!" 

"Sounds like these doctors of yours really are miracle workers" Caitlin commented.

Oliver took a deep breath, Sara placed a hand on his shoulder. 

"I'm very sorry Oliver, I know all of this hits too close to home, and the last thing I want to do it is to rub all these things on you. I'm sure you did everything you could in this situations, our earths are different in many ways, which probably altered the outcome of everything, so please don't think this was all your fault" 

Oliver smiled. "How did you know I'd be blaming myself?" 

"I'm you" the other man replied simply. "But it's things like this you should begin changing, there are billions of factors that affect situations, just think about that, we live in a great wide world where humans interact with each other's lives, it's impossible to point one single person as responsible. Everybody else, even if it was in a small way, has an impact in the results of things. Not everything is your fault Oliver. In fact, barely anything of what you think is on you, actually is. You'll understand that someday"

Oliver nodded. He knew it was impossible to change in just seconds, but all he had to do now was to think of that. A version of himself telling him not to blame himself all the time. That was a sign at least. 

The elevator doors opened to reveal a man lifting his arms in wonder. "What is that I hear about you cancelling the amazing party we're having tonight?!" 

Tommy. Oliver recognized him in seconds. He looked almost the same, of course a bit older than when he had last seen him, but the same innocence on his eyes. 

E5 Tommy stood surprised looking at the large group of people. 

"New friends I see? Oh and one looks just like you" E5 Tommy pointed out and that made E5 Oliver chuckle. 

"Tommy, these are the heroes from Earth 1. They're here asking for my help" he explained. 

E5 Tommy nodded and walked towards the group. 

"Pleasure to meet you, I'm Tommy Merlyn" he shook some of their hands. And stopped once he saw a teary eyed Oliver. 

"Can't remember the last time you looked at me with such love, all you want to do is kick the shot out of me" E5 Tommy pointed out to E5 Oliver. "No this one, seems to actually care about me" 

"Oh shut up Tommy you know Id die for you" E5 Oliver responded laughing. 

E5 Tommy smiled and patted Oliver on his back. "I figure by the look in your eyes you haven't seen me in a while back in your earth?" 

Oliver nodded. "You.. you died on me Tommy" Oliver replied. E5 Tommy took a deep breath. "I'm very sorry, but hey, if your Tommy was anything like I am, then you should know, I love you my brother. And I'm always with you" he said smiling. Oliver smiled and laughed at this man's energy. He looked so happy. 

"So, what can we help you with?" E5 Tommy asked clasping his hands together. 

"I already helped them Tommy. And I'm going with them, to save the multiverse" E5 Oliver cleared his throat looking at his Tommy. 

"Okay... when is the whole universe saving thing?" E5 Tommy questioned. 

"Soon" E5 Oliver replied looking at the others and receiving a nod from them. 

"But not right now?" E5 Tommy asked. Everybody shook their heads. 

"So, why don't we all head upstairs. Grab a drink, have a party, have a good time and celebrate the newly engaged!" E5 Tommy pointed at E5 Oliver. 

"Tommy, that's just irresponsible" E5 Oliver protested. 

"No, no. As your best friend I made a vow to you. To not let this life consume you and blind you of the wonders of life, meaning to have fun! to make sure you smile as much as you punch. And laugh, as much as you arrest" 

Oliver couldn't help but laugh. 

"In my defense, we made those vows when we were drunk" E5 Oliver added talking to the team. 

"Tommy, they are superheroes, in suits, and some, look just like people in our lives." E5 Oliver protested.

"Yeah that would be pretty hard to explain. But for all we know this could be your last chance to have a good time! You said it yourself Ollie, to live everyday as if it was the last, because it may very well be, the last. Not only is that true for everyone, but it's even more true to you people, who go out there every day, risk your lives. And I bet its easy for you to forget that, The mere fact of being alive is worth celebrating." E5 Tommy spoke to all of them. 

Kara smiled. "He's got a point" everyone turned to look at her. "The world could end at any second, and if there's nothing we can do right now to stop it, then the least we can do is make sure we don't waste our last days of freedom. For all we know, the skies could turn red tomorrow morning and we would have lost our chance at fun!" 

"She's right. There's nothing we can do right now to stop this crisis" Sara added. 

"Are you seriously thinking about going to a party right now?" E5 Oliver asked. 

Oliver shrugged. "I guess we are" 

...

Oliver, Diggle, Sara, Barry, Cisco and Caitlin entered the party wearing a lot of crazy makeup and wigs. Cisco couldn't stop laughing at the sight. They looked ridiculous. 

All the others weren't a part of this Oliver's life. 

They all took a deep breath looking at the large room filled with somewhat familiar people. "This shall be interesting" Sara commented and was the first to step forwards. 

Oliver was left alone after a few minutes. He had just been staring at everyone. He knew almost everybody in that room. 

He stood up from the bar and walked checking his clock. As he looked down he didn't notice the blonde woman next to him. They crashed and he raised his head to see her, Felicity. 

He smiled and she frowned. He totally forgot about the makeup and wig. 

"Sorry. That was my bad" E5 Felicity admitted shakily. 

"No no it's alright" he tried adjusting his voice. "You're Felicity Smoak right?" He asked. 

"Yep, yep. How do you know me?" She questioned. 

"I'm a friend of Oliver's. He talked to me about you" E5 Felicity smiled. 

"Crazy isn't it? We used to date. He proposed. We were going to get married! I was so in love with him" 

Oliver's heart stopped at the revelaron. 

"Who knows what would have happened if we happened you know" she laughed and fixed her glasses. "I'm just very glad he reunited with her, I love her, and I love him. But I'm happy now, Ray is the best husband I could have ever asked for. And maybe Oliver and I would have worked together, I think we did, maybe in another life. But, I'm happy with how things turned out" 

Oliver was so confused. 

"You married Ray? Ray Palmer?" He asked her and she nodded. 

"A few years ago. And we are now proud parents of two" 

His eyes widened. 

"Of two companies! He took over Queen Consolidated and I created Smoak Technologies" She added and laughed. 

"We haven't had children yet!" She exclaimed. Oliver laughed. 

"I'm sorry, I just realized I told you my whole life story without even asking your name. For all I know you could be a stalker... or a murderer. You're not a criminal are you?" 

He laughed again and shook his head. "No. You're fine" 

"Great! Although a criminal would always deny being a criminal which is what you just did so I guess" 

"Felicity! I'm not a criminal"

She nodded insecurely and began walking away. "I'm just walking away to... you know. Avoid any... incidents. But I believe you!" She shouted walking away. 

Oliver laughed and lowered his head. "She always was a charmer wasn't she?" He heard a ver familiar voice behind him. 

He turned around and saw the woman he has known his whole life. The woman he loved so much. 

"Mom?" 

E5 Moira frowned. "Excuse me?" 

Oliver widened his eyes remembering the make up and wig. 

"I meant... OLIVER's mom?" He asked nervously. E5 Moira laughed. 

"I just spoke to Oliver, he told me you were a childhood friend, and that you dated Felicity" 

He frowned. 

"It has always been a great question for me, deciding who was the best woman for my son" E5 Moira leaned in to a chair. 

"Felicity made him a great man! A hero" she began talking. "While Laurel... well, Laurel made him himself" she shrugged. “His best self. And when he’s his best self, he’s a hero as well. So I guess, both make him a hero” 

"So you're happy he's with Laurel?" Oliver asked.

"Oh I have been a fan of that relationship since it began, I've always like who Oliver was when he was around Laurel. And I am so glad, they managed to work things out. It's one of life's greatest tragedies, when two people who truly love each other. Can't be together" 

Oliver smiled. "I'll have to agree with you on that Miss Queen" 

... 

E5 Laurel walked around holding E5 Sara's hand. The latter was laughing with a drink on her hand. 

Sara observed them as she sat in the bar. She sighed hating all the jealousy she was feeling. 

"I was always jealous of their relationship" a British accent spoke behind her, she turned and her eyes widened at the woman. 

"Nyssa?" Sara asked. E5 Nyssa frowned. "How do you know my name?" She questioned. 

Sara panicked. "I- I just do" she replied. E5 Nyssa smiled. 

"As you as depressed as I am Miss know it all?" E5 Nyssa looked down at her drink. 

"Maybe. What happened with you?" 

"A gal did me wrong"

Sara couldn't help but smirk. 

"Look, we could all die tomorrow. How about we have fun today?" Sara questioned taking a bottle from the bar. E5 Nyssa laughed. 

"You're strangely cynical" she said looking at the woman pouring a shot. "I like it" 

...

Hours later and everyone was having a blast. Barry and Kara had danced all night. Dinah had disappeared with a cute looking man. Rene got a bit drunk with Diggle. Caitlin and Cisco got very drunk and Sara and E5 Nyssa got even more drunk. 

Sara was dancing and laughing widely. He frowned seeing E5 Nyssa dance, and couldn’t help but laugh. He saw E5 Tommy flirting with numerous girls. E5 Oliver and Laurel embracing each other and dancing closely. He also noticed how his doppelgänger hadn’t touched a drink in the whole party, made him wonder if he was doing that for Laurel. He knew he would. 

Barry and Kara had taken over the karaoke station. People cheered them as they stood on a table singing. Caitlin and Cisco cheered them as well while they hugged. 

“That’s my friend!” Oliver heard Caitlin shout and he laughed at that. 

Oliver had spent the whole evening talking to the counterparts of his friends and family whilst pretending to be a stranger, he was surprised at how much he found out about himself. E5 Roy and Thea, who were now married, spilled all the tea of him with him. He couldn't help but find that hilarious. 

He also partied with E5 Tommy like the old times. And also with E5 Laurel. He was sure E5 Oliver was pissed at him for taking away his own two best friends. 

But what he did the most was analyze. How happy and fun they all looked. He wanted nothing more than seeing his own friends and family like this. 

He spotted an Earth 5 Quentin Lance hugging his two daughters tightly. Looking more than happy. 

E5 Moira and Thea hanging out as well. E5 Roy suffering trying to make the in law proud. 

Everyone was there. Everyone was alive. Everyone was well. 

He wanted that. For the city to be safe. For his family and friends to be alive and happy. For him to be in love. For him getting his own happiness. 

It was the end of the night and he was sitting on the couch with E5 Laurel besides him. There were still people partying outside. But the living room was empty, with only him and her. She yawned tiredly. Oliver smiled. 

"Of course you're here yawning about to fall asleep when there's a party outside" Oliver joked. She laughed. 

"Never been one to party have I?" She asked closing her eyes for a second. 

Oliver shook his head. "Oliver" he turned to look at her. 

"I have wanted to say this for a while, but, I want you to know, that I'm sure your Laurel loved you." Her voice came sleepy, her head was resting on the couch and she had her eyes closed. Almost asleep. 

He smiled and nodded. "I know, she told me" he replied. 

"Okay good." She began drifting away getting comfortable and warm on the couch. 

"But I didn't say it back" Oliver spoke in a low voice staring at her sleeping form, so eager to take her in his arms. He tucked her hair behind her ear. 

"And now I'll live regretting that for the rest of my life" he admitted, he knew he was talking to himself now. She was asleep. 

He smiled sadly. 

"She out?" E5 Oliver stepped into the living room. Oliver nodded smiling. "Just passed out" he laughed. 

E5 Oliver smiled as he walked closer to her. "I can take her to bed if you want, if you want to keep partying" Oliver proposed. 

Oliver knew that about himself. There were so many parties, before the island, in which Laurel left early. She would always tell him she was tired and that she had school the next day. He would nod and let her leave. He would escort her out but stayed partying. He loved partying and he wasn't going to let anyone stop his fun. So Laurel would go home, alone. She never hated him for that, she knew he liked his fun. 

"Oh are you kidding? If she's not with me, then I don't want it." E5 Oliver shook his head as he kneeled before his sleeping fiancé. 

"I would trade any party just for a moment with her in my arms" he added stroking her cheek. 

Oliver nodded. "As you should" he admitted and watched how he took her in his arms, carrying her bridal style towards the bedroom. 

"Stay at whatever room you'd like. I'll see you tomorrow" E5 Oliver whispered walking away with Laurel. Oliver wondered how did they still have the mansion. 

He stared at the man walking away with her. It was funny, he looked like him, and she looked like her. But he wasn't him. And she wasn’t her. 

Yet Oliver wanted to be. So badly. He couldn't stop staring, at who he'd be. If only. 

"You okay?" A drunken Sara approached him. Oliver laughed at her. "You're not at your best state for me to open up" 

"You're wrong about that. I'm at the perfect state, because I'm honest and I'll forget about it all tomorrow" 

Oliver chuckled still staring at the other two.

"Come on, what is it? What is the question in your mind? What have you been asking yourself Ollie?" She begged. 

Oliver took a deep breath. 

"Ollie?" 

E5 Oliver have his Laurel a kiss on the forehead before stepping up the stairs. 

"Can I be him?" 

He asked that sounding so broken. So hurt. Sara widened her eyes. Oliver looked down. 

"I want to be him. And now, my life's about to end. And I... I never got the chance. To become him" 

"What does that mean?" 

"Don't you see Sara? He's who I've always aspired to be. So wise, so mentally healthy, so... so free" he sighed. "I always thought that, because of the life I lead, I'd never be able to become him" 

"And now what do you think?" 

"Now I realize that. By saying that, I wasn't justifying me not becoming him. I was giving myself an excuse." 

"But I thought you liked this life? You loved Felicity? And your children?" 

"I do. With all my heart, and I don't come close to regretting it. But a part of me will always wonder what could have life been like. If only I could have two lives" 

Sara smiled sadly. 

"We all wish we could have two lives Ollie. But it's simply impossible" 

"I know" Oliver turned to look at her. "I know"

Sara patted his shoulder. “At least we already know what that life could have been Ollie, it sucks that we’re not them. But, at least we know there is a version of us who got their happy ending.” 

Oliver nodded and sighed. 

...

The first thing Oliver noticed was red, red everywhere. He sat up from the bed immediately, looking very alerted and freaked out. 

He stood up and opened the curtains, to confirm his fear. Red skies everywhere. He rushed out of the room putting on some pants and a jacket. 

In the living room he found his whole team. Looking at a woman in front of them. It was Lyla. 

“Lyla?” John was the first to ask. 

“Not anymore. I was sent to warn you” 

Everyone frowned. “It’s time. The crisis is here” 

Oliver gulped and turned to look at Barry. He looked like his life was over. 

“We need to get out of here then” Kara spoke first. “Let’s gather our things and go. Someone alert Oliver and Laurel” 

Cisco nodded and ran upstairs. Oliver took the file with information his counterpart had given him. 

Everyone was doing something. From Sara taking pills for her killer headache, to Barry writing a farewell letter to Iris. 

But as they felt movement beneath them they stopped moving. Oliver lifted his head from the file. 

“What’s happening?” He questioned and began hearing screams. 

E5 Oliver lifted his eyebrows looking around. His phone started ringing. 

“Mom?” He asked sounding scared. 

“Mom?!” He screamed when her voice got cut short and the line disconnected. He looked up at everyone in fear. 

“WHATS HAPPENING?!” He demanded m fear as he clenched the phone. 

Kara took in a sharp breath. “This is the crisis. It’s already begun” 

E5 Oliver felt his heart drop, he rushed to the windows to see some sort of matter swallowing people on the streets, dissolving them. 

“This is how he is destroying the Earths, one by one” Cisco explained. 

“Well do something!!” E5 Oliver screamed. 

Barry looked at him sadly. “Oliver, there’s nothing we can do” he said in a Sorry tone, Cisco was already opening a portal. Barry, Kara, Dinah, Rene, Diggle, Caitlin and Cisco were the first to walk in. Leaving only Sara and Oliver behind. 

“Come with us” Oliver told his other self. “Help us save your world” 

E5 Oliver had tears on his eyes. He clenched his jaw and looked back again. 

“There’s very little time. But we can stop this. If you just come with us!” Oliver begged. 

“Ollie!” E5 Oliver’s heart dropped to his knees when he heard her scream. E5 Laurel appeared running. 

“What’s going on?” She asked looking around. E5 Oliver rushed to get Laurel, she made her way down the stairs and headed towards the portal. The mass getting closer to them.

“Wait what about my dad?!” E5 Laurel asked. “And, and Sara. Ollie I can’t lose her again” 

Sara’s heart ached. E5 Oliver shook his head. “Laurel, honey, I’m sorry, but there’s nothing we can do. Not anymore” 

“Come with me!” Oliver begged again seeing how the matter entered the room. 

“Laurel please. I can’t do this without you” E5 Oliver cupped her cheeks. She nodded and turned towards the portal. 

“Oliver! Laurel?!” E5 Tommy came out of a room, a room very close to the mass. 

Oliver’s eyes widened when he saw that.

“Tommy!” E5 Laurel pleaded, E5 Tommy turned to look behind him, the mass literally in front of him. 

“No TOMMY!” E5 Oliver shouted while E5 Laurel began running towards him. But she stopped once she saw him dissolving. 

“Oliver what’s happening to me?!” E5 Tommy asked with a broke and scared voice. 

“Ollie help me please!” He screamed again while E5 Laurel covered her mouth watching him disappear. 

He was swallowed by the mass and Oliver began crying, he had seen him die once, and he really didn’t want to see it again. 

E5 Oliver looked up again with tears on his eyes. 

“Ollie?” E5 Laurel asked as she raised her right arm towards him. Her left arms being already swallowed. 

“NOOO LAUREL!” E5 Oliver begged taking her hand, he began crying watching the scared look on her eyes. 

Oliver lowered his gaze at their joined hands. Sara shut her eyes observing how her sister died again. 

E5 Oliver was next, he saw his hand starting to dissolve. He turned around just in time to face Oliver. He gave him a sympathetic nod with tears on his eyes.

“This is your responsibility now” he told his counterpart. Oliver nodded knowing where that came from, his dad. 

He smiled sadly as his other self disappeared into the mass. 

He turned and took Sara’s hand. “Let’s go” he told her and they walked towards the portal. Each with a new ache on their chest, of having to watch his loved ones die, again. 

They disappeared through the portal just in time. And seconds later, Earth 5 was no more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m going to be honest with you. I had trouble understanding the crisis, so I’m sorry if there are mistakes here. I don’t really know why but I just didn’t understand it. Which is part of the reason why, I’m not writing about that. I wanted to focus more on the whole Oliver rewriting history part and what inspired him to make those changes, so the crisis won’t be a part of this fic. Hope you enjoyed!


	3. Choices

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whatever is written in italics will be like voiceovers that Oliver hears. You’ll understand as you read.

Oliver gasped awake. He sat up violently breathing quickly. Wasn’t he supposed to be at peace? This wasn’t peaceful.

He took in darkness, that’s all there was, darkness. There was also silence. Not a sound could be heard, only of his beating heart and shaky breath. Which he wasn’t supposed to have. He had died. Hadn’t he?

He looked around as he clutched his chest trying to calm down. How the hell was he there? Wherever there was.

As he closed his eyes all the memories flooded back, of him dying, being somewhat brought back, yet as some sort of specter, fighting the anti-monitor.

“You have failed this universe!”

He smiled at that. He had planned on saying that ever since he was presented with the chance to save it.

Then he remembered lying on the ground, Sara and Barry besides him. Him saying goodbye. Looking at the universe he created. Universe he created? He frowned.

“That’s right Mr. Queen, you created a universe of your own” a voice made him open his eyes, alarmed.

It was the monitor’s voice, he recognized it by now.

“What?” Oliver asked not understanding.

“As savior of the universe, you were also selected as master of the universe” Oliver grinned.

_“I can’t exactly picture you as master of the universe”_

Laurel had once told him. He was actually excited about meeting her in the afterlife and proving her wrong, he was the master of the universe indeed.

“But there’s a slight problem Mr. Queen, in the creation of this new universe, you made several alterations” Oliver frowned looking at the Monitor.

“I don’t recall making any changes.” He admitted.

“We’re talking about forces beyond those that we speak, I’m afraid, your unconscious mind made the decisions for you”

Oliver gulped. “What did I do?”

“That’s where the problem lies. You haven’t decided on the changes. Your unconscious revealed your unhappiness about reality and your desire to change it. Creating an aberration in your destiny. As master of the universe, you are in charge of designing this brand new reality. The new universe hasn’t been created yet, and it won’t be until you are able to make the changes. Starting from day one”

Oliver’s heart skipped a beat. “Wait, so you’re sending me back in time to when it all started?” He questioned.

“In a way I am, your whole life will play before you. And you have the liberty of making changes whenever you desire.”

“H-how?”

“You’ll see” Oliver felt himself being pulled down by forces. He fought against them.

“WHATS HAPPENING?” He asked struggling.

“Remember Mr. Queen, this is a rewrite of history, the world according to you. I advise you to think well of your decisions. For every action had its respective consequence, and if altered the wrong thing, your fate as the green arrow may never be fulfilled.” Mar Novu spoke and it sounded like en echo.

Oliver felt a pain on his whole body, a sensation of falling. He shut his eyes struggling to get up, but he couldn’t. He felt frozen. Dead.

“Now, without further ado. Create”

He opened his eyes again to find himself in the hospital room. When he was born. It was like watching a movie on fast forwards, his whole life playing before him. Well at least only the important moments.

His childhood. Christmas mornings. Birthdays. Thea being born. Him and Tommy teasing their little sister. Him going to school.

Oliver focused widely at the big F on one of his exams. He remembered Tommy’s scared face, they had both gotten an F and they had been threatened to be removed from football if they failed.

He remembered in the next exam, throwing pieces of paper towards a little brunette girl sitting in front of him who always seemed to get As. 

He focused on her green eyes when she turned around and rolled her eyes at him. He remembered his smile. How she seemed so annoyed, yet she gave them the copy.

Oliver smiled at that and continued looking at his life in fast forward. He was a teenager now, hanging out on Tommy’s house when he stole a kiss from the brunette who became their friend.

She kissed him back. Yet they swore to never do it again to not break their friendship. It was a pact.

He has never been so happy about breaking a promise.

Because he saw 1 year later, he and Laurel on her porch, kissing against the moonlight. He held her hand softly while he said.

“Can you please by my girlfriend?”

They were like 13 at the time. Which is why Laurel refused, well either that or Quentin barging through the door of her room with a taser and screaming at Oliver.

He saw himself kissing a bunch of girls after that. Meaningless girls, he didn’t even know their name now.

Until he was 15. And he found himself kissing Laurel again. This time at his house. Hiding from Quentin. He remembered being in such awe. She had turned into a beautiful young girl. Giving Oliver stomach butterflies.

“Laurel, can you please be my girlfriend?” She said no again. Well at least he thought she did before Moira barged in offering them food.

More years went by. He saw himself bending in laughter with Tommy. Smiling while playing football.

Teasing around with friends, with teachers. The charming young boy that was Oliver Queen. Always bringing a smile to people. But his favorite smile was always her’s.

They were 17 now. Oliver won a football game and instead of running into his teammates’s arms he ran straight to a brunette woman cheering him, he loved that she had become a cheerleader just to get time to look at Oliver practicing.

They embraced in a tight and sweaty hug.

“Dinah. Laurel. Lance. Can you please be my girlfriend?”

Quentin stood up from the benches, Moira jumped excitedly at the two. Dinah pulled Quentin down and Robert shushed Moira.

Laurel smiled widely, showing her dimples that Oliver adored.

“Yes I can” she assured him and they kissed against the moonlight again.

And then he saw what he would describe as the best years of his life. Having a blast at parties with Tommy and sharing beautiful moments with Laurel. Going on dates. Watching movies. Buying gifts.

He graduated. He and Tommy wrote a thankful note to Laurel expressing their gratitude for making them pass.

So many more taser threats from Quentin. He saw their first time. His first passionate night with her. He saw them waking up together and him being so sure she was the one he’d want to do that for the rest of his life with. What the hell went wrong?

Oh right. College. He was hot. He was young. He was rich. Of course girls died over him. Laurel would call him telling him she was busy studying, she had tests, she had a lot of work. And he just wanted to party. He’d be depressed for not being with Laurel, Tommy made sure he got his doze of alcohol to forget.

And then the alcohol became poison, for one night he felt another woman’s lips press against him. Not Laurel’s.

Oliver began struggling again. This was like reliving a nightmare. Him falling under the spell of jerkism.

Suddenly more girls appeared on his vision.

“I have a girlfriend” he would drunkenly protest. “And she’ll never know” the other girls would reply.

They were somewhat right. Laurel never did find out about them, she was busy building a strong future and developing herself while he was devouring alcohol and cheating on her. They would sometimes go through days without seeing each other. Laurel would always apologize and bring him something feeling guilty about not making enough time for him.

Oliver hit his head against the floor. Oh how he hated himself.

“Don’t you think it’d be nice to have a place of our own?”

No no. Too fast. Way too fast. He cursed. He had spent entire nights with other women, he knew he wasn’t ready to live with her, he knew she didn’t deserve that.

“Sara, would you like to come with me to my dad’s boat trip?” He asked over the phone.

Oliver let out a scream in frustration. He hated himself there.

And then he saw it all. Laurel giving him the picture looking so innocent on her red jacket. She smiled sweetly at him. That was the last time she ever looked at him with such love.

He entered the boat and met up with Sara. He shoved Laurel’s picture on a pouch and tossed it to the other side of the room. He and Sara landed on the bed already making out.

Oliver wanted to change that, yet he knew he couldn’t. That island made him.

Then it all happened. The boat was sabotaged. Sara was sucked under. He was also sucked under but not before grabbing the pouch.

“Survive. Right my wrongs. This is your responsibility now” he saw his dad shoot himself on the head.

And then that Damn island. All the pain, all the horrors. His head ached at the overwhelming visions of torture and suffering, but time would slow down every time he looked at himself staring at her picture. That beautiful picture of her smiling, looking so innocent, there was a panic on his throat, she would never forgive him for what he did, and for who he became. Yet he held on the her, held on to the desire of her. Wanting to see her again, and apologize.

“Hello Laurel” until he saw her again. Her eyes full of shock. Of disbelief. And anger.

“I wished you’d rot in hell a whole lot longer than 5 years” those words stung, but he deserved those.

“Stay away from me” he told her then. She was already ready to forgive him and he was already pushing her away again.

He looked at his bow as he set up the lair on that basement. This was the start of it all, he was home, and he’d save the city.

He admired himself back in that year, he was so focused. So determined. And so in love with Laurel. He’d still stare at her picture, he’d still dream about her. He saw himself smiling like an idiot just because Laurel had told the hood that she believed the world needed people like him.

“There were times when I wanted to die... in the end, there was something I wanted more” he had never spoken truer words, for the hope of seeing her again was what made made him pull through.

She allowed herself to kiss him. And he felt the most joy he had felt in 5 years. In that moment he knew, she still loved him somehow.

“Maybe I’m ready to admit that, I still have feelings for you too” she told him and he wanted to smile and give in, but she was with Tommy.

Yet that didn’t stop him later. “You know me better than anyone, and you, are more important to me... than anyone” he revealed to Laurel and she kissed him. Finally giving him what he wanted all that time.

He knew he was hurting Tommy. His best friend.

“You’re a killer” Tommy spoke. “I wish you had died on that island” Oliver can’t remember ever feeling so hurt.

But then it all came clear, Tommy was hurting, he was jealous, confused, scared. And he admitted it while he was pinned under that damn rock with an iron bar stuck through him.

Oliver somehow found new strength and released himself from whatever was holding him back. He found himself stepping off a bike as CNRI collapsed.

“Someone PLEASE help him!!”” Laurel screamed. Oliver entered the building and found Tommy.

“Oliver?” Tommy asked looking at his best friend.

Oliver kneeled to get the rocks off of him. “I’m gonna get you out of here” he assured him, this Oliver knew he was going to die, but he had the power to change things didn’t he?

“Another thing, we may have to disagree on” Oliver barely reacted when he saw the iron bar.

“Listen to me Tommy, I WILL NOT! Let you die! Not you! Okay? So please, just, just work with me here alright” Oliver almost sounded angry.

Tommy noticed his angry and desperate expression and didn’t wasn’t energy in protesting. Oliver got him out and took him to the hospital.

Now this was all new. He turned as he heard Laurel scream his name. She was covered in dust and looked pale, she collapsed in his arms while they sobbed together.

“I’m afraid we don’t know how long he’ll be in that comma for” the doctor told them. Oliver felt himself being pulled down again... seconds later he found himself in that very same room watching his life go by, yet there were many things he didn’t recognize now. He left for the island once the doctor told them they didn’t think he’d be waking up anytime soon, but all he knew was that when he returned, Laurel looked way thinner than she used to be and seemed like her usual light was off.

He fought the urge to change that, he knew that dark path would lead her to rise and become someone better. He couldn’t change who Laurel became.

There wasn’t much about that next year he wanted to change. Of course he wished he could have saved Slade but he knew that would happen eventually. He saw Laurel tearing herself down. Becoming an addict. He saw Felicity, making him feel better and forget about his own problems. What a breath of fresh air she was to him.

“CHOOSE!” Slade commanded. “No! NO!” Oliver replied, once again Oliver found strength to release himself and become the man he was seeing. He suddenly had a knife which he’d use to break free and attack Slade. Save his mom.

Tommy woke up. Laurel went back to him. They saved each other. Tommy made sure she returned to health and she made sure he healed up nicely.

Oliver fixed his relationship with Tommy. He was pulled into the darkness again. And then the time came. Where he revealed his love for Felicity. Of course it was to fool Slade, he always believed that. Months later Diggle convinced him it wasn’t because of that. But to be honest he wasn’t sure, would he grow to love her eventually? Sure. Just not then yet.

He allowed the third year to play out the same way. There were no major changes that year, he would have loved to save Thea and Sara, but he knew they’d be fine eventually. And Sara dying made Laurel become the Black Canary, of course Tommy disapproved and they broke up again. Tommy moved to Chicago saying he wanted to study medicine, Laurel joined team arrow. Oliver winced at how hard he was on her, he wanted to kick his own ass for ever bringing up her addiction to her while she was struggling.

But he killed Rah’s al Ghul and was convinced he was in love with Felicity. Or at least he thought. It could be a desire to get away from it all. A desire to give normal life a shot. So he went away with Felicity.

He looked at all those special moments between them. But for a reason, he didn’t really feel as melancholic towards those moments as he did with those with Laurel, after seeing everything with Laurel, it didn’t compare with what he had had with Felicity. But how could he not see that? It was true Oliver was looking at it all at once, while the actual man on his visions had spent years without having felt Laurel’s love.

Which made him wonder. Was he really in love? Or was he just in a desperate need for a reminder of what true love was like?

Oliver frowned in confusion, and to make matters worse, he noticed himself smiling when Laurel and Thea interrupted his engagement to Felicity. Why was he smiling?

He felt his blood boil when he saw Damian Darhk for the first time. Yet he still didn’t know what he would do about that.

He allowed Darhk to do everything. Shoot Felicity. Kidnap William.

He shook his head as he saw Felicity breaking up with him over keeping William a secret. He cursed when he saw Laurel’s hurt expression finding out Samantha was another of his mistresses. He was so focused on trying to bring Felicity to her senses he didn’t even stop and wondered what Laurel must have been feeling.

He didn’t feel anything whenFelicity returned the ring and that worried him. She was the love of his life. He remembered being so hurt. But he didn’t feel much at the moment.

I guess that’s what happens when you see things at a different perspective. It all becomes so much clear.

He saw Laurel place her hand on his cheek telling him to save some of the hope for himself, and with that he felt the respective ache on his chest, she had so much faith in him, she loved him so much.

And there he was. Iron Heights. April 6, 2016. He took a deep breath and frowned when everything froze, like if a movie was paused, all he was left seeing was Laurel, frozen by Darhk’s magic.

“What happened?!” He shouted.

“I don’t know Mr. Queen, you paused it”

“I didn’t do anything!” Oliver protested. “Like I explained before, the subconscious has the power here. And you’re conflicted about something. You can’t go on” The monitor explained.

Oliver turned back to the screen. He knew he was conflicted and he knew he had to make a choice. Between what was, and what could have been.

He clenched his fists and closed his eyes. Letting memories flood back.

_Her name is Laurel Lance. And..._

_~She was my home. ~_

_So what’d you miss the most?_

_~Laurel. ~_

_I saw the way you looked at her. That kind of love doesn’t die._

_~And you still love her!~_

_Diggle I made a choice!_

_~you chose Laurel. Always her. Everybody else be damned~_

_I guess some things never change. You and her_

_~always and forever~_

“Oliver? OLIVER?” When he opened his eyes he found himself on the Queen mansion. Wearing a brown leather jacket, jeans rolled up at the end and brown shoes as well.

He stared the woman before him. It was Laurel, on that wedding dress. The one in that dream with the dominators.

“This wasn’t real” he shook his head.

“No. It wasn’t. This was a dream, which showed you your dreamed life” she replied getting close to him.

“No we don’t know that” Oliver looked down.

“Except we do. Do you really think the dominators knew you so well they build up a dream world themselves? No Oliver, they designed technologies that would be capable of reaching the subconscious, and based on its desires, create a dreamed world” Laurel explained.

Oliver looked up at her.

_Dinah. Laurel. Lance._

_~will you marry me?~_

_The person you fell in love with me._

_That’s not me._

_~and I never deserved that love~_

_I love you_.

His eyes opened again and he was no longer at the mansion. He was topless on a cell with Adrian Chase.

“Confess Oliver!” Adrian begged.

“You know it. I know it! Confess!”

Oliver shook his head. What did this have to do with anything?

“Confess what?” Oliver questioned.

Adrian smiled and slapped Oliver. When Oliver turned the whole world began spinning and he found himself on a football field. He turned back around to look at his smiling girlfriend.

“What was that for?” He asked knowing she had slapped him.

“For having waited to long to say it” Laurel replied smiling.

“Say what?” He frowned.

“I love you” Laurel whispered. Oliver smiled remembering exactly what that moment was. The first time he told her he loved her.

He looked down at her. “I’m sorry it took me so long Laurel. But know that even if I don’t say it sometimes. I will never deny it! And I will never stop loving you.”

Laurel pulled him closer and pressed her lips to his. He closed his eyes smiling, and when he opened them he found himself kissing Felicity.

_Forget her!_

_Yao Fei took Laurel’s photo._

_You love her man. You even told her so._

_Diggle talked about Felicity._

_You don’t really see straight when it comes to Laurel._

_Diggle began convincing him Laurel was a liability._

_The only reason I believed her was because it was Laurel._

_Oliver starts believing she was a problem._

_I have loved you for half of my life._

_But I’m done running after you._

_Oliver giving up on Laurel._

_He saw Felicity smiling at him. Laurel screaming at him. Crying because of him_.

Oliver shook his head and focused on Felicity. He hated the idea of choosing the woman he loves based on who had treated him better, Laurel didn’t exactly treat him well, but he hurt her. He never hurt Felicity. It’s understandable Felicity always treated him well.

“Slade took Laurel because he wants to kill the woman I love”

“I know”

“He took the wrong woman” he now felt it again. How it had truly been. After months of Diggle telling him the feelings were real, he had somehow convinced him, but being there now, he realized, he was only ever thinking about saving Laurel, and stopping Slade. He felt sick noticing everything started because of Diggle’s persistence, constantly making him believe he loved Felicity more than Laurel.

“Confess Oliver” Chase’s words echoed through his head again.

“Am I the woman you love Oliver?” Felicity asked holding his hand.

“Let the truth come out!” Adrian screamed. Oliver hung his lead low and gave it a slight shake.

“This were all mind games” Oliver admitted. “There’s a power in consistency, I pulled away from Laurel because I hurt her, you got in my path, everybody around me convinced me you were what was best for me. Everyone told me I should love you. And I do love you Felicity. But... you’re not THE woman I love”

“Confess” Adrian whispered.

“Laurel’s the woman I love” he added, he saw Felicity’s face turn sad. “And for the past few years I have been forced to shove that down, to ignore those feelings, of course you’re sweet, you’re fun, you’re pretty, you’re kind, you’re hilarious and you’re so understanding, you’re such a good person”

“But?” Felicity asked.

Oliver took a deep breath. He looked down at his hands. Holding the photo. Laurel’s photo.

_Does she know how much you love her?_

_Shado asked Oliver._

_I assume right now. She doesn’t._

_But as soon as I’m home she will._

_He replied so sure of himself._

Oliver took a deep breath. “You’re not Laurel” he shrugged. Felicity looked disappointed.

“Why do you love her so much Oliver?”

“Because of who I am capable of being when I’m around her. Because of how she looks at me. Who she sees in me”

_“Those 5 years didn’t change me. They just, they scraped away, all the things that I wasn’t and revealed the person I always was which is the person, that’s who you always saw. And I don’t know how you saw it... but you did.” Oliver still remembered that day, he had been so excited, thinking it would all finally be over, and he would be able to be with her. _

“Because she is who I’ve always known, she’s still who I fell in love with her. Maybe a bit more damaged, but always Laurel.”

_“Nobody in my life... is who I though they were. Except you”_

Oliver and Laurel kissed passionately on that room of the mansion.

“Felicity, I couldn’t possibly live without you. I need you, you have saved me. Millions of times. And I have had my life with you, I chose to keep being a hero and I chose to do that by your side. You and I we had a magical journey in which I became someone else.”

She frowned waiting for him to continue.

“But now that I’ve been given a second chance I have elected not to waste it! And deep down I have always known I wanted to be with Laurel too. Felicity, Laurel is the woman of my dreams, I literally dream of her in pink and gold. She’s my fairytale, she’s my ideal world. There’s just something about her that makes me feel... she makes me feel... warm. Safe. Happy”

Oliver took Felicity’s hands.

“Because of the life that I lead, I had to choose my savior. And that’s you. But now, I want something more than my savior.”

“And that’s Laurel?”

Oliver nodded. “Felicity, you’re my savior, but Laurel... Laurel is my home”

Suddenly everything turned white and Oliver was thrust to a hole. He landed on his feet. His heart sunk once he realized where he was.

The roaring alarms blared throughout the entire prison, he couldn’t move a finger. He saw Darhk walk towards Laurel, holding his arrow. He had to save her. He was supposed to save her. He had chosen to save her!!”

He fought the magic with all his strength. Yet he couldn’t break free of it.

“I want you to give your father a message”

Oliver’s heart began beating faster by the second. What was he supposed to do now?

Darhk kept approaching Laurel. Oliver groaned trying to move.

“I want you to tell him”

No no no no. Oliver did his best, he struggled, he fought. Please no.

His heart stopped when he saw Darhk lodge the arrow into Laurel’s abdomen. Every part of his body ached once he realized he hadn’t been able to save her. Once he realized he had just stood there. Letting him hurt her.

His vision got blurry. He focused on a gasping Laurel clutching her side.

Everything around him seemed hazy. He wanted to collapse staring at her. Tears dropped. All the struggle of choosing, it was all for nothing. It was too late. He couldn’t save her.

The focus returned when Darhk set them free of the magic. He collapsed to the ground. Wanting to kill everyone involved. But his gaze landed upon Laurel, her frail body shaking. He knew he was too late, but he still had to get her help. At least so he could say goodbye. Once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t give up on this yet! Don’t worry, I won’t treat Laurel as dirty as the writers did. Let me know what you thought of this chapter.


	4. Promises

The ride from the prison to the hospital had been hell. Oliver was forced to live through that twice, only this time it was worse, he knew it was hopeless, she'd die anyways.

Not only that, but this time he had clarity. He loved her.

And that situation right there, was what he had wanted to change so badly ever since he was presented with the possibility. He had had so much hope, that he would be able to save her.

Yet there he was, holding her in his arms as she bled to death. Her hand constantly squeezing his shoulder in pain wasn't helping at all, every squeeze reminded him of his failure.

He wanted to stop running and just hold her, hug her. Make her feel a little better. But that would just be wasting time, the sooner he got there the better.

This being the second time he did that he tried to avoid everything that held him back the first time. Maybe if he got there quicker he could still save her. Maybe that's how he changed things.

Laurel rested her head on his shoulder in defeat. Oliver felt her hot breath on his neck, he winced every time he heard her gasp. This was torture.

No matter how hard he tried. She still lost consciousness before arriving.

He found himself repeating the same words once he entered the hospital room.

"You gotta help her. Please!" He took her soft hand thankfully still warm and stared at her broken body.

"She's lost a lot of blood"

He knew that. He could see that. He wanted to scream at the doctor telling her to start working immediately. The doctor called for a team while he kept staring at her. Focusing on her chest, silently thanking God it was still rising, she was still breathing.

"Let her go"

His eyes lifted at the woman.

"I need you to let her go so I can do my job"

He knew she was right. Yet he couldn't get himself to actually let her go, to not have her warm hand on his reminding him she was still alive.

"Trauma team will be here any second and the last thing she needs is a circus"

Oliver pressed both his hands against Laurel's.

_Stay with me Laurel. Stay with me._

He didn't know if she could feel anything while being unconscious, but he wanted to let her know. He was there. He squeezed her hand tightly one last time to reassure her, he was there.

Oliver backed away not being able to pull his eyes away from her. Until he did.

...

Oliver entered the bunker and headed straight to the computers and the desks. In one single movement he threw away the whole desk while releasing a scream.

This was rage at its finest.

He slammed the computers. Broke glasses. Threw his own dummy to the floor. He practically shattered everything he could find while screaming in anger.

He then collapsed against the floor, his hands on his head stopping the tears.

"I sent you through time to fix things... not break them" the similar voice spoke. Oliver rose his head, his puffy eyes connected with the man in a ridiculous costume. The Monitor.

Oliver's eyes darkened as he stood up.

"You. YOU TOLD ME I COULD CHANGE THINGS!" Oliver shouted with all his strength.

"I was supposed to STOP DARHK FROM HURTING HER! That's what I WANTED! I WANTED TO SAVE HER!!! But I. I COULDNT MOVE!!" Oliver screamed at the Monitor and once he finished brought his hands to his mouth.

"You DIDNT LET ME SAVE HER!" He broke down crying again and leaned to a table.

"Don't blame this on me Mr. Queen, like I said, your subconscious did this"

"Shut up about my subconscious!!! My subconscious WANTS HER ALIVE. My subconscious WANTS HER! I.. I..." Oliver slammed the chair against the floor.

"I WANT HER!" he admitted.

The monitor stood quiet as he observed Oliver sit down on a chair wiping away his tears.

"This was my only chance. To save her. And I failed. AGAIN!"

"You can still save her" the monitor finally spoke. Oliver huffed.

"There's a prophecy created by the greatest philosophers that states 'in love lies the power, of salvation"

"Stop talking bullshit" Oliver snapped.

"It's not bullshit Mr. Queen, it's the belief that, love holds the power of salvation, love can save people. Literally"

"Really? Are you trying to tell me that because I love her she suddenly won't get an embolism and DIE?!" Oliver asked mockingly.

"Not necessarily like that. But a lot can change by the simple fact of you loving her. Only if she knew..."

Oliver frowned at that last part. Only if she knew.

"Wait what?" When he raised his head he found himself alone all over again. Oliver took a deep breath.

The elevator doors of the bunker opened and Oliver remembered this part. A very confused John and Thea entered the bunker holding his bow and arrows and Laurel's batons.

Their eyes widened at the mess Oliver had made.

"Ollie?!" Thea exclaimed running towards him. John followed her and they joined Oliver at the other end of the room.

"What happened man?" John questioned. Oliver looked up at them, he looked like a mess. Messy hair, puffy red eyes, he looked 10 years older, and his expression didn't symbolize anything good.

Thea gulped looking at him. "Ollie... what happened?" She tried not to break thinking of the worst.

Oliver sighed as another tear rolled down. He had to accept it.

"Darhk stabbed Laurel." His words came out quickly. John and Thea's hearts stopped.

"I took her to the hospital... but she" he let out another sigh trying not to break in front of his little sister who considered Laurel as a sister of her own.

"She had lost so much blood" his heart broke saying the words.

Thea collapsed to a chair struggling to breathe while John's vision clouded with tears.

"I- I'm sorry Speedy, I tried to save her" Oliver lowered his head. "I tried to save her" he whispered and kept repeating.

"I tried to save her"

...

The next few things played out exactly as he remembered. He told John and Thea to distract themselves by finding out what happened with Darhk.

They did exactly that while he changed and headed to the hospital again. He tried calling Lance he tried calling Sara. Even though he knew none would answer.

Then he remembered going though the longest couple of hours in his life. Waiting for Laurel to come out. But his thoughts the first time were about how worried he was, for Quentin, for Sara, for the team and of course for himself. He cared about her. He really did. But he didn't know how much he loved her just yet.

This time he did. He tortured himself remembering every special moment with Laurel and couldn't stop crying. He simply just loved her SO much.

He held on to the hope of what the Monitor had said, he knew it was probably impossible. But it was something. Maybe love could save her.

He shook his head. How on Earth could that be possible?

His thoughts were interrupted when everyone walked in. Felicity, Thea and John.

He had the very same talk with them as the first time. John blaming himself. Thea informing him about Darhk.

He raised his head as soon as he heard the stretcher coming his way. His heart clenched once he saw her. How he hated the sight, of her being so weak, so pale.

"She's out in recovery. She's going to be fine"

_You lying bitch_. Oliver thought yet immediately scolded himself. He knew it wasn't the doctor's fault. He knew she didn't know Laurel would start seizing in a few minutes. But when she said that Laurel would be fine, she had given him so much hope. Only for that hope to be taken away from him minutes later as the very same doctor spoke the words.

_Time of death: eleven fifty nine_

He shook his head once he saw everyone was already on the room with Laurel.

Even though he was on the room. He wasn't paying attention to anything they were saying. His mind was lost.

While Laurel talked to the others, he thought about what he was going to say. When the others left them alone. What would he say now?

"We love you" Felicity nodded squeezing Laurel's hand.

"We love you" Thea said with a broken voice.

"We love you" John also admitted.

Oliver tensed once he felt gazes. Was he supposed to say something? He really hadn't heard a thing.

He just offered a smile to Laurel not having the slightest idea of what they expected him to say.

He looked down as all the others left the room. He could feel the nerves building up in his body. She literally had minutes to live.

"You should probably get some rest too"

"Not a chance. I'm gonna stay right here" he smiled crossing his arms and turning towards the direction where the pouch was before Laurel even told him.

Luckily she was too distracted by the pain on her midriff to notice him knowing every move.

"There's uh. Something in my left pouch can you get it for me?" He obeyed and walked towards the chair. His mind was still conflicted on what to tell her.

He opened it already knowing what he'd find, he pretended to be surprised and did his version of an ugly cry face.

Laurel smiled at him. This was different, an actual smile, almost a laugh.

"Are you laughing at my face?" He asked, it came out from the nerves.

Laurel let out a huff and closed her eyes.

Oliver shook his head, panicking. Had he just made everything worse?

He cleared his throat and took the photo. "You kept this?" He asked, sticking to what he said the first time.

She opened her eyes and took the photo, his heart broke as he saw the woman on the photo and the woman in front of him. Two very different women. His stomach turned at the realization that he had been the one to turn that smile on the picture upside down.

He made her suffer too much. She didn't deserve him. His eyes filled with tears.

"It's just a reminder of... when things were simpler" she looked up at him.

"For us. The way we used to be"

Oliver nodded. He could tell she missed that simplicity, and he did too. All he wanted was to go back to that. Go back to being the man whose only concern was having a good time. Go back to being the man whose worst problem was choosing the right restaurant for dates. Go back to being the man who Laurel loved. The lucky bastard who got to hold her in his arms and kiss her. How he wished he could be the man who loved her.

"I'm really glad you found Felicity" Oliver's heart skipped a beat, a nervous feeling rising to his chest.

"And I hope you find your way back to her" Oliver felt dizzy, he had a million thoughts on his mind, what would he say, what would he do? He had to save her. How?

"And Ollie I know that I am not the love of your life" that felt like a punch in the gut, had he really let her believe that?

"But you will always be the love of mine" he could literally feel his heart stop. This is where all could go wrong. Or right.

This is was his opportunity. To save her.

He panicked knowing it was his time to speak. Laurel just smiled at him. He looked down to the photo.

_~In love lies the power of salvation~_

_The Monitor's voice echoed on his head again._

_~a lot can change by the simple fact of you loving her. Only if she knew"_

Oliver blew through his mouth as sweat builded up in his forehead. He really didn't want to say anything wrong.

He stuttered. He would just love to tell her that she was the love of his life. But it was more complicated than that. There was no way Laurel could prove that, she was so sure she wasn't the love of his life. It wasn’t as easy as just denying it.

Oliver took a deep breath wanting to tell her that he loved her. That he wanted her. That he needed her. But he didn't deserve her. He wasn't the man she saw.

"Ollie?" He cursed once he realized he had taken too long.

"I'm, im sorry I just don't know what to say" he choked out.

Laurel smiled sadly. "You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know that"

Now his heart dropped to his knees. He had messed up. He began shaking his head.

"'No no Laurel. I didn't mean it like that. It's just that... I'm... I'm not the man you think I am" he spoke.

"Ollie I have known you almost my whole life. I think I'm pretty sure I do know who you are"

"That's because you see the best in me Laurel. That's because you see the best version of me. And I'm not him right now. And for that reason, I can't give you the love that you deserve"

Laurel shut her eyes and his heart began racing. Any minute now she could die.

"Laurel? Laurel listen to me. I- I can't love you. This me can't love you. Not yet" he took her hand as tears began forming.

This was panic. He felt his face lose its color and his body become weak. She could literally die at any second.

Laurel took a deep breath and began closing her eyes again after having had opened them for a second.

"Hey! NO LAUREL! Stay with me! LISTEN TO ME!!"

She opened her eyes despite her exhaustion and how bad she felt. Everything around her was blurry. She could just focus on him. On his face.

“Laurel please. Hey hey Laurel” he pulled her full attention to him.

“I said NOT YET! Not. Yet. Laurel, give me a little time, let me become the man you love, and I promise, the man you love will give that love back to you. Just, just let me become someone who deserves you. Okay? Did you hear me? Wait for me Laurel! Wait for me!” He begged cupping her cheeks and letting a thousand tears fall.

Laurel managed a soft smile.

He tightened his lips. “Can you do that? Can you wait for me? Can you wait for me to become the man who can love you?”

Laurel now felt even worse. She knew she wasn’t okay. She could barely focus on Oliver, she felt dizzy, tired, in pain, nauseous, she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t see. This was it.

“Laurel can you promise me!” He shook her head with his hands noticing her expression.

“Answer me PLEASE!” He begged crying.

“I- I p” Laurel let out a breath. “I promise” her voice came barely audible.

“No no no!” He exclaimed when her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she started shaking violently.

“NOOO LAUREL!” Oliver screamed as he let her head go and rushed to press a blue button next to the bed.

He vision clouded as he was pushed to the back of the room. Everything in his head was muffled, his vision, his hearing.

“You promised” Oliver whispered crying. “You promised”

Oliver saw everyone enter. Laurel was still seizing. Everyone screamed.

Everything seemed to slow down for him. The muffled noise cleared out and the haunting sound of a flatline took its place.

Laurel’s heart had stopped breathing.

He didn’t even feel like he was on his body anymore. He couldn’t feel his body.

“You promised” he whispered again.

The Doctor gave Laurel an electroshock and Oliver collapsed when nothing happened and history seemed to be repeating itself.

Compressions started. Oliver could feel nothing but the strong beat of his heart, hating the fact that his heart was still beating strongly while hers wasn’t.

“Come on! Come on!” The doctor exclaimed still doing the compressions. She was sure she had already damaged Laurel’s body even more.

“Laurel you promised” Oliver whispered again.

Suddenly everything slowed down even more as Oliver brought himself to look at the clock on the wall.

Oxygen found its way back to his body when he read the time. It was 12 o’clock.

Past 11:59.

He returned his gaze to Laurel again.

_I promise._

Her voice echoed on his head.

Oliver stared at Laurel’s face. He just stared at her, there was the ring of the flatline echoing through his head.

But his heart jolted once that long dreadful ring stopped, and became a constant beep.

He felt something rise from his stomach to his chest. Overwhelming his whole body. This was hope.

The beep kept coming and he allowed himself to focus on the doctor.

“We’ve got a rhythm!” She exclaimed as she stopped the compressions and stared at the Monitor, lines went up and down representing the constant beat of Laurel’s heart.

Oliver was sure he was floating now. At least that’s how he felt. His eyes fixed on her. She did promise. She promised. 

He blinked slowly and finally breathed, when she did.

She gasped and allowed oxygen enter her body. And so did he.

He was shaking. Shaking with joy, shaking with hope.

“She’s back!” The doctor exclaimed. Slowly, every sense returned to Oliver’s body. He could finally feel.

A shot of energy traveled through his body and expanded on his chest, and he just couldn’t help but smile. Smile widely. Showing his teeth even.

“She’s alive” the doctor confirmed.

She’s alive. Oliver repeated on his head. She’s alive.

He looked to the outside of the room, where nurses and doctors rushed in and out of the room. But he spotted one single man standing in the middle of it all.

Mar Novu nodded at Oliver.

“ _You see Mr. Queen, your love won’t heal her from her stab wound, it won’t stop the embolism, it won’t stop the seizure. But your love made her heart beat. For you have given it a reason to. Oliver, you gave Laurel’s heart a reason to keep beating. That’s how the prophecy is fulfilled, that’s the power of love”_

Oliver nodded back to the Monitor. He let another tear fall down his cheek. But unlike all the others. These were tears of joy. He smiled at the man as he disappeared into the air.

Oliver turned around towards Laurel again and rushed to her side noticing she was awake. He was sure she must have been feeling awful. In so much pain.

“Mr. Queen we’ll need to give her a sedative. I’m afraid the embolism has caused further damage that we need to work on, the body needs to be fully at rest” the doctor told him.

He nodded. “Just, just give me a second” he kneeled down and took her hand.

He brought his hand to her cheek and tucked her hair behind her ear. Laurel winced and breathed deeply.

“Hey. Hey” Oliver brought her attention to him. Laurel smiled at him through the pain.

“You’ll be okay, you’ll be okay” she squeezed his hand tightly.

“Hey look at me” Oliver stroke her cheek while her green eyes met his blues.

He smiled widely. “You stayed” he told her.

She nodded weakly. “I- I said I’ll wait for you Ollie” it took so much struggle to say those words. She swallowed hard and winced before looking at him again.

“I promised” she said firmly along with another tight squeeze to his hand. Oliver smiled at that and planted a kiss on her forehead while the doctor injected the sedative.

Seconds later she was unconscious again. Oliver looked down at her.

The doctors forced him to let her go so they could work on her.

Oliver agreed this time and walked out of the room. He walked through the hospital hallways with a victorious walk. His head up high and a big smile on his face. He even felt like dancing.

He had done it. He had saved her.

His love was really that powerful.

He laughed at the thought. A smile couldn’t contain his joy, so he laughed.

His love saved her.

Maybe he was worthy of her love after all. If it was that great to save her, then maybe she did deserve him.

Well, she deserved the best him. And if there was one thing he knew for sure was that he would become him. As quickly as possible.

Because Laurel was waiting for him, and he.. well he just couldn’t wait. For her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!! Sorry if this was a bit painful. But hey, Laurel Lance lived!


	5. Reconnection

The clinking sound of metal hitting metal was the first sound Thea registered as she walked through the sliding doors of the elevator. Her brows furrowed taking steps closer to where the sound originated from.

Oliver gritted his teeth as he ascended one more level of the Salomon ladder. He was shirtless and sweating.

Thea cleared her throat when her brother came to view. "You've been busy" Thea commented, Oliver looked down at her, he hadn't heard her come in.

As he held on to the pole, he changed his tired expression to a bright smile. He let go and landed on his feet.

"Hey Speedy" he greeted her and spread his arms, Thea's frown deepened.

"No. No what are you doing?" Thea questioned stepping away, clearly disgusted by all the sweat. Oliver kept moving forwards wanting to bother her. He hadn't removed the mischievous grin from his face.

"Oliver!" Thea protested when he caught her and embraced her. She grimaced at the evident sweat soaking his entire body.

She couldn't help but laugh at his teasing. It felt good, like the old days. Made her wonder what had changed.

She hadn't seen Ollie since that night Laurel got stabbed. She clearly remembered him walking away from the hospital room with a somewhat victorious expression, and an energy she knew as confidence.

She knew there was something different about him. Although his behavior that night unsettled her, the young woman was still more preoccupied on Laurel than her brother. So she went back in the room and stayed there.

Thea had spent the most of two days by Laurel's bedside, making sure she got everything she needed and that she was reminded how important she was to Thea and the team.

Laurel had asked her about Oliver and his absence. He hadn't stopped by at all. Laurel knew he was probably busy with Darhk. That didn't change the fact she wanted to see him still.

Oliver had made it clear he had feelings for her, but after having not showed up to see her, Laurel couldn't help but wonder if those feelings were real.

So finally Thea decided to go look for him. She first called Felicity and Diggle, who told her he had barely spoken to them. John revealed Oliver told him to go look for Andy, Felicity revealed he told her not to worry and to move on with her life. That the team was taking a break.

Felicity obviously still worried and did her best to find Darhk, but on her own. With her own computer at her own facilities.

Thea went straight to the bunker where she knew he'd be. She walked into the bunker expecting to find him brooding somewhere, probably exploding himself trying to find Darhk or training to beat him.

Although she did find him training, he wasn't brooding, he didn't seem like he had been beating himself up and drowning in guilt and shame. He seemed, somewhat... fresh.

He was laughing and hugging her. Teasing her.

She pushed him away and wiped herself clean while he put on a shirt as he wore a smile on his face.

"Oliver, where the hell have you been these last three days?!" Thea asked cleaning her face with a towel.

"Here" he replied simply and took a sip of water.

"Doing what? Oliver you just shut everyone out! We all care about you" she scolded him as her arms crossed over her chest.

"If you would have wanted to see me, I was here. I understand everyone has different priorities now. Which is why I gave the team a break"

"Oliver, everyone's priority is finding and getting rid of Darhk" Thea looked over at him while he walked towards the chair.

"No. John's priority is Andy. Felicity's priority is getting herself to stand being in the same room with me, I highly doubt Laurel's priority is Darhk, and your priority is Laurel"

"And what is yours?"

Oliver smiled looking down. "Me" he replied.

Thea had to take a step back from the shock. Out of everything he could have said, that answer was the one she expected the least. It had never been like him to put himself first.

Oliver chuckled at her reaction. "I- I beg your pardon" she shook her head.

"You do realize the whole team has fallen into a dark path right? I mean John is blaming himself and beating himself up for what happened with Andy, he could probably use a friend, his best friend perhaps. Felicity, she lost you, Laurel, she, she needs you Ollie"

"I know. And I want to be there, I want to be there for all of them. But there's a reason why I can barely ever help anyone around me. It's because I can't even help myself. Because I have fallen into the darkness, how could I help anybody while being in the shadows?"

"So what you're doing is"

"I'm fighting my own way out to become someone better and then be there for her"

"For whom?" Thea questioned noticing how hopeful his voice sounded.

He was looking down fidgeting with a small pen. "Laurel" he spoke so firmly. He lifted his head to look at Thea.

"I can't be there for her and not be me. I need to be me, the real me, to be there for her"

"And who is the real you?" Thea asked.

"A man who deserves her" Oliver didn't hesitate with the answer.

And with just the tone of his voice Thea could tell what he meant. He was finally allowing himself to focus on himself. In order to be better.

She dared to look at his eyes, her stomach turned at what she saw. She almost wanted to cry.

For the first time... in years. She saw him. Her brother.

The man who had been overprotective of her since kids, who had hit another kid with a stick when he approached his baby sister, the boy who teased her and laughed with her, yet fought with her over the littlest of things. The little boy who made her laugh. The brother she lost.

There he was.

"Ollie... what happened?" She asked as her eyes filled with tears.

Oliver smiled again. "I... I found myself. I think"

"How?"

Oliver took out a book. An album of pictures. Of them since they were kids.

"I've been staring at these pictures for the last three days, and slowly I observe all of them. I remember those moments and I think about who I was there. What made me be that way. Who made me that way."

He turned and turned the pages until he reached one of the lasts. He pointed at a picture of him with his mom in an event.

"Mom's favorite picture of you" Thea nodded.

"There's a reason it's her favorite. I remember that day as it was yesterday. This was an event hosted by mom and dad, and she had told me how much she wanted me there. I told her I wouldn't be there, I had a party that very same night. A big party."

"And then you surprised her by showing up" Thea continued his story. Oliver nodded.

" she later asked me what had made me change my mind" Oliver took a deep breath.

"And what'd you say?"

"That, a girl, reminded me of the importance of family. That somebody made me realize that the simple fact of making my mother proud and showing her my support was more important than my status, that being a son showing support to his parents defined me more than being a man drinking and partying his way through popularity"

Thea smiled at that. "And what'd she say?"

"She said: that Laurel does bring out the best in you ha?" He laughed. "I remember being so surprised"

"Why surprised?" Thea questioned.

"Because I hadn't mentioned the name. Laurel and I weren't even dating at the time"

"So how'd she know?"

"I asked her that. I said: how'd you know it was Laurel?"

_"Oliver. A mother recognizes when her son is at his best. And even though you make it seem as if you're always at your best, pretending to be happy surrounded by your so called friends. I can tell that you're only really you, when you're with her. And sometimes with Tommy. But there's just something about this girl."_

_Oliver smiled at his mom widely. Just then a photograph came up to them. Moira stood besides him with a smile. But Oliver wrapped his arms around her and hugged right in time for the photographer to take the picture._

_Moira was almost crying. That was her son. And as she spotted the woman walking their way with a smile on her face she patted Oliver's back. "Don't ever let her go" she whispered and walked away. Oliver let that sink in, he greeted Laurel with a hug and kiss on the cheek._

_"Don't ever let her go"_

Oliver hugged a teary eyed Thea. "Don't you ever wish we could go back to that?"

Oliver nodded. "Every day since I came back from that island I have wished to have it all back. When I realized things would probably never be the same again, I tried to move on. Trust me, I really tried to move on like you have no idea"

Oliver smiled remembering his whole life with Felicity, in that other timeline, a dead Laurel, dead Tommy, dead Moira, yet a wife, and two magnificent children. In a whole other reality. He managed to move on, but he wasn't himself. And that's truly all he wanted now, to go back to being himself.

"But recent events have made me realize, there is no moving on from your true self, and there are people who I just can't let go of. For they are responsible for who I am, I can’t push them away to protect them or anything. The only thing I can do is... make sure their lives are better because I'm a part of them. And that won't happen if I let myself be in the dark, I must better myself Thea. And that's all I'm trying to do"

Thea smiled and hugged his brother. "For what's it's worth Ollie... you've already made so much progress" She whispered into his ear.

Oliver smiled. "And I've only just begun"

"what's your next step?" She asked squeezing his shoulder.

"Letting everyone back in...

Reconnection"

...

"Tommy?" Oliver asked as he walked through the hospital hallways.

"Oliver! How dare you?!" Tommy seemed angry. Oliver frowned and stopped in front of him.

"Laurel almost dies and you don't think to tell me?! We may not be together anymore but that doesn't mean that I don't still care about her!" Tommy protested.

Oliver nodded. "You're right Tommy. I'm sorry" he spoke with honesty and even a bit of regret. It's not that Oliver didn't want to tell him, truth be told, he was so used to Tommy not being around he had forgotten about him, it was a nice feeling to be reassured he was there now.

Tommy sighed. "It's okay."

Oliver shook his head. "No Tommy. I'm sorry. For everything" he hugged his best friend tightly, earning a frown from Tommy. He froze in the other man's hold.

"Oliver? Is everything okay?"

He felt Oliver nod in the embrace, his arms were still straightened on the side while Oliver's were wrapped around him. "It's just that. For the last few years we have allowed our differences get the better of us... but differences do not change the fact that you... you are my brother Tommy. My very best friend in life. And I can't even begin to explain to you what my life without you would be like"

Oliver knew what a life without Tommy was like. And he didn't like it.

"Don't worry buddy. You won't have to find out" Tommy replied finally hugging him back.

"I'm sorry too you know. I've been a jerk for quite a while." Tommy added and Oliver scuffed.

"I think I beat you in that category" Oliver replied as he pulled away. Tommy smiled.

"We're just a pair of jerks aren't we?" He laughed tucking his hands to his pockets. Oliver shook his head.

"We WERE a pair of jerks" he reassured Tommy with a pat on the shoulder. Tommy looked at Oliver and nodded. They both smiled and walked towards the room.

...

Tommy and Oliver opened the door to the room and walked in cautiously, yet they were taken back when they didn't find anyone on the bed.

Oliver's throat filled with panic once again and his stomach turned. But it all went away when they heard the flush of a toilet.

The two men stood anxiously outside the bathroom door and took a deep breath, they heard water next, but the door wouldn't open. Oliver tightened his lips in waiting.

Tommy checked his clock as a joke. Laurel always took her time on the bathroom, having both dated her they knew that. But now she was just taking longer, understandably though.

They looked at each other almost laughing. Then finally, the door opened.

Laurel hissed at the shock of finding two men standing in front of her.

She altered looking between the two faces. She first saw Tommy's sweet blue eyes with a shy awkward grin. She smiled at that, he was good at being cute.

Then she focused on Oliver's eyes, also sweet, also smiling, also shy and awkward. Yet he was blushing, which sent a weird feeling to her stomach she knew she liked.

"Hi" Tommy spoke first. Laurel shifted her weight to one side and pulled Tommy close. He provided support for her while he held her protectively. Her head under his chin. Tommy gave in to Laurel's warmth and squeezed her a bit more, He closed his eyes finally relaxing.

"I'm so glad you're okay" he whispered, Laurel grinned.

Oliver offered her a smile when her eyes caught his. She pulled away from Tommy to look at him.

"Thank God, I thought you had gone and joined the Dalai Lama or something like that" Laurel commented getting close to him.

Oliver and Tommy chuckled. It was Oliver's turn for a hug. Oliver simply wrapped his big arms around her, as if he was a blanket. She rested her head on his shoulder and shut her eyes.

Tommy smiled sadly staring at them. If there was one thing he knew for sure, was that no man could ever comfort Laurel the way he could.

Oliver stroke Laurel's hair and he took in her scent. His heart ached at the very well known hospital scent. He wanted to keep holding her but she pulled away first.

Oliver never removed his hand from her waist though, offering her support.

"So. How you've been doing? I'm sorry it took me so long. But I just found out about this, you know I would have come way sooner" Tommy spoke.

"It's fine" she wrapped her own arms around her body and winced slightly.

"You want to go back to the bed?" Oliver asked taking in her completion and rubbing her arm. She looked stronger than the last time he had seen her, but not well yet.

"Actually, I'm being discharged" she responded looking at Oliver. Oliver frowned looking at Tommy.

"Is that healthy Dr.Merlyn?" He asked the soon to be doctor. Tommy smiled.

"It's not recommended, I think it's still pretty soon Laurel"

"And so they've told me. But I, I really just want to go home. And I promise to lay low and rest. I really do." Laurel begged sounding stronger than she felt.

Oliver and Tommy knew how stubborn she was capable of being. So they both gave up. "Okay" Oliver sighed.

Tommy took a look around. "You really had made up your mind already ha?" He noted the packed bags and her being already in civilian clothes instead of a gown.

"I really don't know how you did it Tommy. I got enough of it at the second day" she smiled. Tommy shrugged.

"I was highly drugged" he replied and cursed once a realization came over.

"But you asked not to be, didn't you?" He asked and tightened his lips as she nodded.

"I'm so sorry Laurel" he apologized and placed his hand on her shoulder. Suddenly feeling a brand new wave of sympathy towards her, not only had she been seriously hurt, but she had chosen not to take anything to numb the pain down, because of the fear of losing herself again.

"Don't be, you didn't say anything wrong" she told him. Tommy curved his lips up.

"Can I take you home?" He asked stepping closer.

"And can I come with?" Oliver stepped in. Laurel smiled looking at the only two men she had ever loved deeply. Also known as the two most chaotic men she had ever met.

"Sure. Just try to keep the chaos down" she grinned.

"Chaos? What do you mean chaos?" Tommy asked teasingly and Oliver laughed.

"Tommy since you're a doctor now, can you go check if you can get those discharge papers ready?" Oliver asked, Tommy nodded. "Of course" he planted a kiss on Laurel's cheek and walked away.

Laurel turned to smile awkwardly at Oliver. What the hell was she supposed to say now?

"So where you've been?" She asked.

"At the bunker. I do have to apologize for not coming sooner, I just thought you'd be crowded and maybe I could speed up the process of... bettering" he grinned.

Laurel nodded. "Well crowded is right." Her eyes widened as she said that and Oliver chuckled.

"Who came?" He crossed his arms over his chest while she leaned against the wall.

"Thea and my dad never left, they bickered a lot. Then, my mom also came. John and Felicity, even Mrs. Smoak a few times. Never thought Id say this but thank God for that, she managed to get my father off me. Then there was also Cisco and Caitlin, they excused Barry, they left soon though saying they were dealing with umm" she shut her eyes remembering.

"Zoom?" Oliver asked. "Yes! That. What is it with them and camera parts?"

Oliver laughed. "I wouldn't know. Just like us and our need of specifying the colors of our icons"

Laurel let out the best she could of a laugh. Oliver had a shy smile as he stared at her, he was amazed by her, by the woman before him.

He spent years looking at Black Siren’s face, a mirror image of Laurel’s. Yet never once did he feel that turn on his stomach some would identify as butterflies, never once had he longed for her, but every time he looked at this Laurel, every time he set eyes on her, he would feel all of the above.

Tommy entered the room again. “We’re good to go” he said letting out a breath. Laurel nodded, she looked at Tommy offering her his hand and then saw Oliver taking her bags. Her heart jumped at the thought, of things going back to the way they used to be.

Just the three of them.

Against the world.

...

“Are you hungry?” Tommy was the first to speak. Laurel turned to look at him besides her. “I really don’t know” she replied frowning.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Well, I can’t differentiate if it’s the wound or actual hunger, but what I do know is that I am craving some big belly burger” she pointed at the restaurant as they went pass it.

“No can do” Oliver who was driving added. “The doctors left us strict rules of what not to and what to eat”

Laurel cringed at that. “Nobody even follows those. I say you make a u turn and stop there. Right Tommy?” She smiled as she patted Tommy on the shoulder.

Tommy looked at her with a serious expression. Every fraction of his body saying ‘no’

“You know it’s bad when I’m the funnest of the three” she commented resting back to the seat.

Tommy nodded clearly agreeing yet didn’t say anything.

“I think you’ll come to find that we grew more into papa bears than party boys” Oliver spoke smiling.

“Which means, we care more about your health and what’s best for you” Tommy added. Laurel was slightly annoyed, but her chest exploded with happiness at the feeling of being cared of by two of the most important men on her life.

“I’ve got an idea though” Oliver spoke and didn’t even let them respond before abruptly parking the car next to a curb. Tommy grabbed Laurel before she crashed to the front seat because of the violent move.

Laurel and Tommy frowned, but didn’t notice as he just opened the door and got out of the car. They looked at each other.

“Way to leave us hanging” Laurel spoke and Tommy grinned.

“Where’d he go?” He asked almost laughing.

“You know Oliver said he’d change, I’m actually a bit scared of what he’ll become” she teased. “Because apparently spontaneous is his new thing”

“What do you mean NEW thing? He’s always been spontaneous” Tommy questioned looking over the window.

“Well he was, like 10 years ago.” Laurel agreed. Tommy smirked returning his gaze towards her.

“Maybe someone’s making a comeback” he shrugged. Laurel couldn’t help the excitement rising in her chest.

Just as he said that though, Oliver appeared back into view. Laurel focused on him through the window. He walked confidently holding a brown paper bag. He had a somewhat mischievous smile. Like he had something planned.

She saw how energetic he looked, excited. Smiling and greeting strangers on his way.

He opened the car door and slid in. He placed the bag on the empty front seat since Tommy sat next to Laurel on the back seat.

“What’s in the bag?” Laurel was the first to ask. A question that would be repeated throughout the whole way to the apartment because Oliver never gave the answer.

...

Laurel smiled as she entered her apartment. She really missed it. Thea had left it organized and tidy. Thank God for that. She sighed in relief as she touched the couch.

It had been a stressful week. She pondered at how quickly her life had changed, at the start of the week she stressed over the fact that she had to either accept or turn down a job offered by the evil mayor, but that seemed as a joke compared to stressing over life or death. When Laurel woke up after having crashed, she felt panic for two days straight, it could easily happen again, and she was scared she wouldn’t survive this time. She felt so weak.

But now she was finally home. She was walking and talking. Still feeling a bit weak, sore and tired. But at least she knew she’d be okay.

Tommy’s hand on her back brought her back to reality. “You okay?” He asked softly.

“Yeah. I was just reflecting on the week I’ve had” she replied looking at the ground.

“How life changes in the blink of an eye?” Laurel nodded at his question.

“Yeah I know the feeling.” He added and held her close.

“Makes you rethink all your life’s choices” he took a deep breath. Laurel smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. She had so much to think about. So much to reconsider. 

Oliver walked in with the bags. “Tommy! Get your hands to the kitchen!” Oliver ordered.

“I can help” Laurel told Oliver. Oliver smiled at her.

“We don’t want any more incidents” he said carefully. Tommy snorted.

Laurel rolled her eyes. “No you don’t worry, Tommy and I will be prepping your meal while you get yourself comfortable”

“I’m gonna go take a bath” she turned towards her room. Her hand was pressed to her side.

“Scream if you need anything” Tommy said.

...

Laurel sat on the couch hugging her knees. She kept caressing her wounded side due to the fact that she was feeling an excruciating amount of pain at the moment, but she knew the reason of the sudden increase of pain.

She had been sitting there staring at Oliver and Tommy TRY to cook together. And she couldn’t remember when had been the last time she had laughed so hard.

She had tried to hold it back knowing once she gave in she wouldn’t be able to stop. But when Tommy jumped from the sting of touching a burning hot stove and hit Oliver in the process she lost it.

“Tommy stop! We need to behave!” Oliver said firmly trying to look serious, but his eyes betrayed him as they were expressing his desire to burst out laughing.

Tommy nodded biting his inner cheeks. “Yes sir” he spoke weakly.

He resumed his duty in cutting the vegetables but couldn’t stop the incoming laughter. He was shaking and looked like he was having a seizure.

Which didn’t help Oliver at all. Because he began laughing again. A loud snort came from Tommy when he breathed and that made Oliver lose it once again.

Laurel took a deep breath and shut her eyes trying to stop. But for some reason, she didn’t really want to. Yes it hurt like a bitch. But it felt right, it felt good. Like a whole wave of energy surged through her body, and for the first time in days, she didn’t feel so weak.

When she opened her eyes again she saw Oliver slapping the back of Tommy’s head as a way of scolding him.

Tommy was saying something but in her and Oliver’s ears, it was something in Chinese. The laughter mixed with the words and he wasn’t making any sense. Oliver lifted his head to look at Laurel, a frown on his face. Laurel simply shrugged wiping away a tear.

“Idiot” Oliver mumbled making Tommy laugh more. Oliver smiled widely at his laughing best friend. The last time they had laughed together like this had been before the island. He was sure of that.

Laurel managed to calm down. Her eyes were teary, but they glowed. Sparkled.

Oliver looked at her again and he felt his heart drop. She had a smile on her face. Sparkling eyes and most importantly, red cheeks. After having seen her so pale he had forgotten how she looked, when she was genuinely alive.

Laurel caught his eyes. She examined him, looking so free, so fresh. With a real smile on his face and hopeful eyes. Both suddenly feeling as if they were back to who they used to be, and although they hadn’t said those three little words in decades, their eyes spoke for them.

_I love you._

...

Tommy and Laurel sat on the couch close to each other. His presence was a comfort to Laurel.

“So... what did you think about my soup?” He asked.

“Tommy, you burnt yourself and mildly cut the vegetables, this is Oliver’s soup” Laurel replied smiling.

Tommy nodded. “You’re not wrong. Where the hell did he even learn to cook?” He questioned and Laurel shrugged.

“But Thank God for that” she added. Tommy chuckled. They both stared at the candlelit chimney.

She suddenly felt a blanket appear from the sky. Well not from the sky, Oliver was above them covering them both with a blanket.

“Thanks Ollie, but I’m not cold” Laurel spoke, she had been wearing pants and a hoodie and was very close to Tommy, she was warm.

“But you will be” Oliver replied as he stood before them. Holding the brown bag.

“What’s in the bag?” Laurel asked once again. Oliver smiled as he revealed what was inside.

Laurel felt her lips spread into a smile once she saw.

“Rocky road?” She questioned.

“How could I forget?”

Oliver took his place on the couch next to her. He gave her and Tommy some bowls and spoons. He also got under the blanket.

As she sat between Tommy and Oliver eating Ice Cream, Laurel’s mind drifted to the past.

Countless nights of them sitting that way. All in one couch bringing warmth to the other. Eating ice cream, watching TV, since they were kids, they had started by watching cartoons, by as they grew Laurel was forced to watch sports. She grew to like them. But then she forced them to watch her soapy teen shows. They never admitted it but they liked them.

Oliver looked to his right, his two best friends since childhood sitting besides him. They had both gone through some awful things, they had both changed, grown. Yet as they all sat there, they looked like the same little kids. He focused on Tommy, how much he had missed him in that other timeline, obviously Diggle grew to be his great friend, always supporting him, but Oliver felt different when he was with Tommy, it wasn’t just support, it was more. The same with Laurel, he focused on her, the woman he loved, he had witnessed her go through awful things, he saw her lose herself, yet come back, and with one single smile remind him of what it felt like, to love her, he had grown to love Felicity, greatly, but there he was feeling something different with Laurel, it wasn’t just love. It was something else.

Tommy still remembered one night, they had taken a ski trip. Laurel was shivering at the cold. He remembered sitting on one edge of the couch while Oliver wrapped her up in blankets, and how she, unconsciously chose him. Since then. Because as she sat in the middle of two, she decided to wrap her arms around Oliver. She curled up to him and held him close.

Of course he wasn’t surprised when a few days later they revealed to be dating.

Tommy took a deep breath and took in the moment. After finishing her ice cream, Laurel curled against the blanket and gave in to the exhaustion. And even though she had a choice now. Of two different set of arms to hold her. She turned to her left, resting her head on his chest and wrapping an arm around him. Around Oliver.

Oliver turned to look at her, she had her eyes opened. She curled against him. A smile spread across his lips. A sweet smile towards her, she stared at the fire before her. He placed a tender kiss on her head and stroke her hair. She closed her eyes.

Oliver rose his eyes to look at Tommy. Tommy had tears on his eyes, accepting the truth, it shouldn’t have been a surprise, he knew in the end she would always choose him. But he wasn’t mad. These two were the people he loved the most at the moment. And if they made each other happy, then so be it. His teary eyes that glowed with the light of the fire stared deep into Oliver’s. He offered his brother a kind smile and patted his shoulder.

“Don’t ever let her go” he whispered.

Oliver’s heart sunk as everything came to place. His mother’s voice echoing through his mind. And now Tommy’s.

_Don’t ever let her go._

It dawned on him what felt so different when he was with Tommy and Laurel instead of Diggle and Felicity, both Tommy and Diggle showed him support, both Laurel and Felicity showed him love.

But as he lied on a couch with Tommy’s hand on his shoulder and Laurel’s arms around him he realized the only difference was. That now. Finally.

He was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you thought of this!

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t know if Earth 5 was ever mentioned before on the shows but I just chose that Earth because I like the number. So my apologies if it has been mentioned before and it’s not like this! But this is an AU so I don’t think it matters much.


End file.
